As a newly wedded wife, three things were suggested to me, if my entry to the Defence Services society were to be smooth, by the self-appointed “ragging brigade” – drinking alcohol, eating non-vegetarian food and ball-room dancing. My principles were dead against the first two. But, I had kept an open mind about the third.

One of the factors that influenced my decision was, I always preferred to be a participant than a spectator, whether it be stage, TV or dance floor. It was alright  to watch the antics of the dancers for sometime; but to do so for 5-6 hours was quite boring. Even the perfunctory conversation with the fellow wall flowers would pall after sometime, consisting as it did of weather, picture, quarters, maids and children if any.

A conservatively brought up Tam-brahm, I was totally new to the western dance culture. I did not want to commit any gaffes and so would always refuse the offers of the officers. About ten years later, when we were posted to a smaller unit, I decided to learn the rudiments of ball room dancing from the Commandant’s daughter who was an excellent dancer. She would teach me around mid morning everyday at her place for a week.

The classes in Foxtrot, Waltz etc were going on smoothly and secretly, until one morning the CO himself dropped in unexpectedly on an unscheduled visit home and caught me in the act. He good humouredly joined in the conspiracy and begged for the favour of launching me in the next party. As the party began, I pretended to get involved in the usual chat- “weather, picture… etc etc.” As expected, there was advice galore for me not to be a prude but to join the fun on the floor. As the orchestra struck music, through the corner of my eye I could see the CO slowly detaching himself from the group and saunter towards us.

He came directly to me, bowed gallantly and asked, “May I have this dance Mrs Ramu?” I gracefully glided on to the dance floor on his paternal arm without pausing to check the shocked reaction of my friend!

Later as I returned to my seat, I could hear the unsporting comments  from the menfolk, “She does not choose to dance with us, the lesser mortals. She dances only with the COs.”