Partiality begins at home. Or else, how would you explain this? On Mother’s Day, the lady of the house gets cards, hand-made gifts, roses and kisses. But very few know that the other parent too has a ‘Day’ and he would be lucky to get a card with all the appropriate words.
The third Sunday of June (June 17, this year) is Father’s Day and even “my daddy strongest” wouldn’t feel any less macho if he gets a bear hug. Somehow, his presence in the house is much appreciated, seldom acknowledged. His role in ‘fine-tuning’ you is taken for granted. So why don’t we make his day special this time?
History is sprinkled with such “special fathers”. Their wards might be path-breakers, but their autobiographies would be incomplete without generous versions of ‘I-am-what-I-am-due-to-Pa’. George Washington needs no introduction. American historians will tell you that little George once went on a tree-chopping spree with his brand new hatchet. His father’s beloved cherry tree was one of the many victims, rendered headless in the end. When confronted, the badly shaken future US President owned up and apparently his dad shed tears of joy at this act of boldness. Augustine Washington has many brownie points to his name for instilling the courage to speak truth in his son.
One century later, in India, another father too booked his place in history books through tears. This time, they were of sheer grief since the son, Mohandas K Gandhi, sold a portion of his brother’s gold bracelet to fund his cigarette quota. Junior Gandhi tried to make amends by writing a remorseful letter to his father, seeking forgiveness. That prompted the tears. They were not wasted. Mohandas shunned the recently-acquired fascinations. India got her Mahatma.
Gandhiji’s favourite disciple, Jawaharlal, too had his character chiselled and moulded by his lawyer father Motilal Nehru. The only son of a super rich family, Jawaharlal was given the best of British education, a handsome allowance and the freedom to choose his career. He cold-shouldered law and plunged into politics. The father was disappointed, but he too followed suit and joined the freedom movement. Motilal, the best-paid lawyer in Allahabad, soon began preparatory sessions for his stint in jail by sleeping on floor. Talk about doting fathers!
What to do...
That was about famous dads. The one you share your roof with might not be a household name anywhere, but that doesn’t make him less special. So this June 17, tell your father that you love him. If you feel cards are too commercial, get a rose — the official Father’s Day flower. Let him know that you are grateful — for signing that report card even when your grades nosedived, for taking your ailing pet to the vet when everyone else wanted to retire the old doggie at the Blue Cross, or for that meagre-but-regular monthly “chillout” allowance.
You can even give him a mild shock by apologising for being a consistent little devil all these years. Shed those horns and say sorry for hijacking the remote control when dad wanted to watch the rare moments when Team India wins, or for being persistently deaf to his do-this-do-that orders or pleas.
If you want to go a step ahead, pamper him with the things he loves best. If he is a foodie, whip up his favourite dish. It can be a corn soup, scrambled eggs or even a mango shake. Don’t worry if the end product assumes a weird shape or gives an acrid smell. All is fair in love and war. Your father will love you for the war you waged in the kitchen.
Artistic skills too can come in handy. If you are fairly good at drawing, do his portrait. Just try to ensure that this product has some resemblance to the original.
If “home-made” surprises won’t do, raid a bookshop or a music store. A classic, a ghazal collection... look for something he will cherish. For better results, consult your mother.
Interestingly, it was also a woman who was instrumental in the inception of Father’s Day. Sonora Louise Smart Dodd was 27 when she first thought of dedicating a day to her dad. It was 1909 and Sonora was listening to a Mother’s Day sermon when the idea struck her. After all, Sonora’s mother had died when Sonora was 16 and it was her Civil-War veteran father who raised all the six children.
Sonora wanted to recognise her father’s contribution. A year later, with the support of the local Young Men’s Christian Association (YMCA), she celebrated the first Father’s Day on the third Sunday of June.
The idea gained popularity in the United States and President Woodrow Wilson gave his nod to the festival in 1916. Almost five decades later, President Richard Nixon established a permanent national observance of Father's Day. Since then, nations across the world have been paying tributes to the man of the family.
There is one more interesting aspect to the day: it is an occasion to acknowledge all father figures in one’s life. Which means the gifts and love also go to your bullying brother, disciplinarian uncle, grandfather, history teacher and the school headboy who, despite their flaws, have influenced and motivated you.
Go celebrate the best man in your life! Happy Father’s Day.