A small fishing village on the eastern side of Thailand just four decades ago, Pattaya is now a major tourist attraction, drawing thousands, mostly young, from across the world. Officials claim that nearly five million tourists visit Pattaya, about 150 km southeast of the capital Bangkok, thanks to its night life and beaches.
The ‘safety’ of the place is another USP that the officials make much of. They claim that even single women are safe while strolling its streets, which look almost like Mumbai in the night. But, it looks like a tall claim as the city is known for its night life and women soliciting customers is a common-enough sight, reminding one of the scenes in Bollywood movies of the 1970s and ‘80s.
The city has over 300 assorted hotels, restaurants and bars. For those who love sport and recreation, facilities like tennis courts, go-kart, gymnasia, weight-lifting and Thai-boxing gear are available. And those who prefer to be on the fast lane, can hire motorbikes and zip around the city at any time. A journey to Noog Nach village on the outskirts is well worth it; performances by elephants there will definitely steal the hearts of visitors.
Many restaurants offer Indian food. Kohinoor, located in a corner of the city, offers good south Indian cuisine — just right for those craving for rice and sambar and rotis, thousands of kilometres away from home.
Hold your breath, you can read a few words in Kannada, written beautifully, stating that Indian rupees can be exchanged for baht. (There is even a Sikh, who owns the shop attached to the hotel, who can put you at ease by speaking in Kannada.)
No soft landing
There were threatening clouds on the horizon as we embarked on the trip. The military junta had just overthrown an elected government and assumed power. There were reports of heavy military presence in Bangkok. We landed from Kuala Lumpur in budget carrier Aero Asia, at the Suvarnabhumi international airport in the Thai capital on a sunny afternoon and proceeded straight for immigration check. But we were in for some unpleasant moments at the counter where the stiff-necked staff made us run around for small things. Proper information was not available on visa formalities. It reminded us of the situation in many of our own airports.
First, it was the language problem and second, they were not keen on receiving tourists warmly. It took nearly one and a half hours — and 1,000 baht — for us to get the process of obtaining the visa started. Then they insisted on “physical production” of US $300 per person or US $700 for a family, for the tourist visa! The experience was really scary as it set us wondering how we'd be able to pay our way through the next few days of our stay in the country.
However, we were in for a pleasant surprise. Our cab driver made us feel comfortable and helped us in loading the luggage into an air-conditioned van. As promised by him, we were at the hotel in Pattaya in 90 minutes flat. And we noticed that the drivers strictly followed lane discipline on the six-lane highway.
Glittering show
Alcazar Cabaret show was the first item on our itinerary. Our guide built up enough momentum, saying there is something unique about the show, which she wouldn't reveal.  There was no confusion as the seats were numbered. The show, of course, had all the razzmatazz of a Las Vegas nightclub. Artistes, in glittering evening gowns, had the audience in the 1,200-seat in thrall.
During the show, free beer and soft drinks were served.Well-groomed 'ladies' mimed and danced against a backdrop of surround-sound and computerised lighting, as the audience kept clicking their cameras or keeping their handy-cams rolling.
The show went on like clockwork, with items ranging from 'pure' Thai fare to Japanese dance. The show concluded with an artiste turning up in a gender-bending attire, giving a subtle hint that the performance was by transsexuals (so that was the “suspense” our guide was talking about). The artistes then posed with the tourists.
Then, it was turn of the sand and the surf. We were told to leave for the beach early in the morning as, by afternoon, it gets extremely hot and unbearable on the seafront.
It all started with surf-churning ride on a speed boat, the first halt being a parasailing experience in the sea. The thrill, lasting just a few minutes, comes at a price — 350 baht.
Then, we were taken deep inside the sea in a glass-bottomed boat to have a look at the coral formations. There was the option of getting into the sea with an underwater swim suit to have a closer look at the coral formations. However, it was slightly disappointing as the experience nearer home (at Andaman & Nicobar Islands), was far better.
Before returning to the hotel, we had great fun in the crystal clear blue waters and on the spic-and-span beach. It was indeed a nice experience to amble on the spotless expanse of white sand with no footprints of the otherwise ubiquitous litterbugs in sight.
Even as the excitement was still sinking in, we were at Nong Nooch Tropical Garden, some 15 km east of Pattaya. The 500-acre site has a well-maintained botanical garden and an orchid nursery. One can easily spend a couple of hours going around the manicured greenery.
Moreover, the facility has lively cultural shows in a Thai village setting. The village has several shops selling mementoes. But the cultural show, accompanied by commentary in Thai, fails to impress.
The visitors can then enjoy an hour or so with elephants. In fact, trained chimpanzees and elephants treat you to some of their own 'tricks' at the garden. One could take snaps with the Malaysian tiger and orangutans.
However, the trained elephants of various ages steal the show. Three baby pachyderms compete in a 'painting competition'. Yes, all three of them draw flowers and a tree on a t-shirt! Later, these are sold to tourists.
Jumbo massage
And there is massage — no, not the one you may associate with Thai parlours. The body-kneaders here, of course, are the elephants themselves. Many lie on a mat for the body massage, hearts pounding away in their mouths. And the elephants do it not with their trunks, but their pillar-like legs.
No wonder, the silence in the auditorium is eerie. But with trained mahouts to control them, the pachyderms do a good job — of at least giving you a mighty frisson. The compering by a girl is just a copy of the shows at night safaris or the one at the Jurong National Bird Park in Singapore. Elsewhere, one can have a glimpse of the gem museum and get a feel of the various stages of mining activity, all sitting in a coach.
One has to be in the museum by evening to ‘experience’ the simulated mining activity. Shopping could prove to be very expensive in the museum. But the officials insist that the stuff on offer is genuine and there is no scope for bargaining.
For those on the lookout for night-life, the city virtually never sleeps. One can find bevy of Thai beauties plying their nightly trade at every vantage point.
Foreigners going around with a couple of girls on bikes is a common sight. Bars and similar joints are always full of girls and tourists. And when the bartender nonchalantly tells you, “Take your pick. No problem”, he doesn't of course mean a new cocktail or an imported wine!