It seems fair to say that I'm a one-date wonder. It's not that I'm socially inept - I have my share of charm, intelligence and looks. It's that I won't have sex and can't be persuaded - an easy way of sieving out potential boyfriends. I'm 24 now and over the years I've watched all my friends cross the bridge into a sex life, most seeming to emerge with a sense of regret. I've heard a whole array of horror stories, enough to put off even the most hardened nymphomaniac - let alone a God-fearing Afro-Muslim emigrée like me. Throughout my life then, I've always stayed on the celibate side of the grass, even if the other side does occasionally look greener, sweeter and more satisfying.

There have been times when it's felt pretty lonely being a celibate woman in a sex-obsessed world, but recently that feeling has subsided slightly. Take even a quick glance around, and it has become difficult to avoid the growing visibility of celibacy groups.

The Silver Ring Thing (SRT), for instance, an abstinence support network based on Christian teachings (and long popular in the US) has gained considerable ground in the past year. Those who sign up to the SRT434 programme (SRT's British regiment) wear a silver band to remind them of their abstinence pledge. Companies such as Waitwear clothing (which prints logos such as "No Vow, No Sex" on underwear) have cropped up, while UK website www.celibrate.org is said to regularly attract hundreds of hits. In the US, books such as Dawn Eden's The Thrill of the Chaste (about the thirtysomething author's decision to give up sex) and Wendy Shalit's Girls Gone Mild (which suggests abstinence as an antidote to objectification) are part of a large wave of chastity-lit, and the Christian pop star Natasha Bedingfield has released the song Single - which some have read as a paean to celibacy.

All of which has helped raise the profile of abstinence considerably - but, let's face it, hasn't exactly made it cool. I like to think that I'm someone who is fairly cutting edge in most respects, but it seems that though celibacy and abstinence messages may be getting more popular, they are still a long way from being fashionable.

I can't help but feel empowered by these flamboyant women. Their celibacy is as much a rebellion as promiscuity.

The Guardian