Harassed husbands? The SC’s recent observation calling for a review of dowry laws (on the grounds that they are often misused) might have women’s organisations up in arms but more and more ‘harassed’ husbands have been raising their voices after being falsely implicated. Sriranjitha Jeurkar investigates why many dowry cases no longer remain plain black and white today
My name is Kumar. I am 28 years old. I wanted to marry a poor girl, so that I could help a poor family. When I told my father about this, he suggested that I marry the daughter of one of his distant relatives, from a town in Andhra Pradesh. I believed that when he had chosen nothing but the best for me until now, he could not go wrong in this decision either. I agreed. I didn't know much about the family, except that the girl's father was a bus conductor. We demanded no dowry and even agreed to foot the wedding expenses. It was a perfect wedding. My wife and I lived together for a month and she went back to her home for some rituals. That's when I realised I had contracted a sexually transmitted disease from her. I was too embarrassed to tell my parents. When I asked my wife about it, she confessed that she had had an affair with someone else and had married me due to pressure from her family. “You didn't ask for dowry, so we thought you had something to hide too,” she said. I was shocked. But I wanted to save my marriage, so I asked her to come with me for treatment. She wasn't interested. She told me that she would give me a divorce by mutual consent if I gave her Rs 5 lakh. And she didn't want to discuss the matter with her parents because she was afraid they'd take away the money from her. Still, I was glad she had told me the truth. I told my parents. Then my company sent me abroad for a project. We applied for divorce by mutual consent, and before I left, both of us went to the family court on six occasions. After I returned to India, she went back home saying that her mother was ill, and didn’t return — not even to attend the hearings. All of a sudden, she started saying that she didn't want a divorce, and demanded that I pay her Rs 25,000 a month as maintenance. She claimed that I was earning far more than I really was, that my family had a lot of property (which is untrue) and said we had thrown her out of the house because she refused to bring Rs 2 lakh from her parents. She claimed that her family had spent a sum of Rs 10 lakh to conduct the wedding. She even went to the extent of saying that we had forged her signature on the divorce petition! She filed a dowry case, and I was named as an accused — along with my mother, dad, cousin and aunt. I was taken into custody and stayed there for seven days, despite my family producing documents, which refuted her claims. She told me that if I paid her Rs 10 lakh in cash, she would withdraw the case. But she also had another demand —that I give it to her in writing that I am impotent. My aged parents had to wait for three months to get bail. We were stripped, and our fingerprints taken, as if we were petty criminals. Until then, we knew very little about the law, and even less about Section 498A. My parents, at one point were on the verge of committing suicide. Due to all the stress, my performance at work suffered. I was terminated. Three years later, the case is still on — and I am still looking for a job. I received three job offers — all of which were withdrawn once they conducted a background check and found out that I had a case pending against me. My future looks uncertain, but there's one thing I'm sure about: I have lost faith in the institution of marriage. I will never marry again.
Section 498A of the Indian Penal Code (Dowry Prohibition and Prevention of Marital Cruelty) is aimed at protecting the woman from harassment — from either her husband or her in-laws. But the loopholes in the law have led to misuse by women across the country. The common perception, that a helpless woman is abused for dowry by her husband's family and the law is her only saviour — is being turned on its head. Bangalore-based advocate Shankarappa, who has been practicing law for the last 18 years, handling many high-profile cases, says that he has seen at least 120 cases of dowry harassment in his career, “But unfortunately about 100 of the complainants had falsely implicated their husbands and husbands’ families.” Advocate M T Nanaiah says that approximately 80 per cent of the 600 dowry-related cases he has handled over 32 years have turned out to be false implications. “Most of the remaining 20 per cent cases are mostly small disagreements that arise in every household. They get converted into dowry harassment cases.” No warrant, no investigation
What is it about the anti-dowry law that makes such blatant misuse possible? First, the entire case hinges on the statement or allegations made by the wife. A single oral complaint can land the husband’s family in jail. No investigation or warrant is needed before police arrest the husband or his family, or begin proceedings. It is non-bailable; the accused must appeal before the court to seek bail. It is not compoundable: the complaint cannot be withdrawn. Worst of all, there is no punishment against the petitioner if the complaint is proved false. Besides, legal experts argue, since the police do not require any proof before arrest, it takes away a basic human right. “Once a woman lodges a complaint, the husband and his relatives are implicated. Even the police register complaints without investigation. They drag the husband, aged in-laws and even young children to the station. The charges may be proved false later, but a criminal record is a criminal record, after all,” says Shankarappa. Lawyers say that most women who file false dowry complaints do so for a few common reasons: to get out of a marriage; to get money, or a favourable divorce settlement; if they had a premarital affair, and were married off by force; for child custody; if they want an attitude change in the behaviour of the husband or the family; to take revenge on their husbands, or in most cases, to get out of a joint family setup. And ironically, the law that aims at helping women, ends up harassing women too. The Save Indian Family Foundation contends that on an average, 30,000 women are jailed every year in connection with dowry cases. “Once the woman files a complaint, the mother-in-law, sister-in-law are also arrested. Why restrict the law to protecting only the wife? What kind of protection do these women have?” asks Philip, whose family was falsely implicated in a case. Virag Dhulia, a member of the Bangalore Chapter of the Save Indian Family Foundation — an organisation that provides support to harassed husbands — narrates his horror story. “A few months after our wedding, my wife went back to her parents' home and didn’t return. She said she wouldn't return unless I agreed to live away from my parents. Then her family filed a dowry harassment case against us,” he says. Dhulia recalls how his parents, who are in their sixties, suffered for months — the fear of being arrested, anxiety about the regular court visits, and the outcome of the case, the shame and humiliation, all adding to their health problems. In what is probably the first such instance in the State, Dhulia has filed a complaint against his wife for giving dowry. “My wife has, in her complaint, stated that she and her parents gave me dowry in the presence of their relatives. According to the Dowry Prohibition Act, taking, giving and abetting the giving of dowry is a crime — the giver and taker are equally culpable. I have not accepted dowry; but if as per her claim, she says she has given dowry, then she is guilty too.” He says that at first, the police refused to file an FIR. “Then I went to the ACMM Court. The magistrate there took cognizance of this complaint and asked the jurisdictional police to investigate into the matter and file a report,” he explains. Even four months after the court’s order, no action has been taken, Dhulia alleges. “I have now filed an RTI application to get information about the progress of the investigation, but have still not received any info.” Help is at hand The social stigma was what prompted Arun Murthy, yet another ‘498A victim’ to set up Sangyabalya — a helpline for ‘husbands and families victimised by the anti-dowry laws.’ The helpline was set up in 2003, after Murthy's sister-in-law filed a dowry harassment complaint against his younger brother. “She was from an orphanage, and she said we had demanded dowry. It was ridiculous,” Murthy says. After his entire family — including his mother and sister were implicated — Murthy’s brother, a hardware engineer, lost his job and became a mental wreck. “I saw how the system works — people are arrested on Friday evening, so they cannot get bail. They have to stay in jail till Monday. And consider this — if you are a government employee, and you are in jail for more than 24 hours, even if under false accusations, then your job is in jeopardy.” Murthy then wrote to a newspaper, and received many calls from other victims. That's when he set up a helpline for these harassed husbands. A few months later, Sangyabalya was registered as an NGO. “A lot of people are on the verge of suicide after being arrested. We give them moral support. Sometimes, the lawyers take them for a ride, so we extend legal aid too. But most importantly, it is a collective voice for proper representation of our problems,” he says. The Save Indian Family Foundation, another organisation that aid people implicated under Section 498A, was first set up as an online community, but later evolved into an NGO. The Foundation now has set up helplines for men in distress. The members of the Bangalore chapter meet at Cubbon Park every Saturday. New members who approach the Foundation are given moral support, and legal advice. “Usually when someone is implicated like this, he tends to feel that he is the only one facing such a problem. When they come here and see that they are not alone, then they feel that they have some support.” Members of the foundation, who come from various backgrounds — from software to government service — study the law and help each other with inputs on how to fight their cases. There are several other organisations working for these ‘harassed husbands’, but most of them have common demands. “The problem arises from extravagant marriages. The giving and taking of dowry should be tackled. No one makes it a point to stop this at the source. After all, prevention is better than cure,” says Dhulia. Murthy agrees, “There should be a mandatory registration of marriages with a record of all gifts exchanged. These gifts are referred to as dowry when things go wrong. And such disputes are family matters. There should be proper counselling available, before the woman goes to the police.” He adds, “The law in itself is not bad. What we need is thorough checks and balances to ensure that it is not misused. We assume that women are all white and men, all black. We must acknowledge that there are shades of grey everywhere.” But most important, these organisations say, is to make provision for action against those who file false complaints, and to ensure that no arrests are made without proper evidence. “Once the complainant sends her husband and his family to jail, chances of reconciliation are few. She thinks its a victory. But that's the only victory, things go downhill from there,” Murthy says. That probably underlines the need for a thorough review of the law as it exists now. The loopholes have to be plugged, activists say, and soon. For the welfare of the women, so that genuine victims of dowry harassment do not suffer because of those who have misused the law. That is the only hope, for the welfare of hundreds of women across the country.
(Some names have been changed to protect identities.)
Review necessary?
Justice J D Kapoor of the Delhi High Court had recommended a review of the dowry laws. He suggested that Sections 406 (misappropriation of dowry articles) and 498A (harassment for dowry) be made bailable and if necessary, compoundable, in cases where no grave physical injury has been inflicted. He had observed, “There is a growing tendency to come out with inflated and exaggerated allegations roping in each and every relation of the husband and if one happens to be of higher status or of vulnerable standing, then he or she becomes an easy prey for blackmailing and bargaining.” Some suggestions of the judge are: Such cases should be investigated by civil authorities, and cognisance taken only after findings. Only police officer above the rank of ACP should investigate harassment and misappropriation of items. A DCP should investigate dowry death cases. When minor, schoolchildren are named, they should not be arrested or sent to court.
Beware of Marrying an Indian Girl !!!
“Honest , Down to earth , Religious , Very Traditional” these are the words that describe about 99% of brides to be in matrimonial sites and newspaper articles. These conjure an image of the Sati Savitri that the Indian women is in the eyes of any Man or prospective groom.The media and the Govt also support this by projecting an image that the poor Indian women who are suffering from decades of male oppression need a helping hand in marriage .
THINK AGAIN young men , What the media or the government do not want you to know about is highlighted below . and these are nothing but the hidden bitter truth behind most Indian marriages .The bitter truth is that the Indian marriage these days reeks of bitter resentment , biased laws against the husband and extortionist wives out to make quick money by unleasing the biased Indian laws against the family of the husband.
1) Twice the number of Indian Married men commit suicide every year as compared to women .The suicides of men are brushed under the carpet as due to financial reasons while that of women as investigated a dowry deaths and additional funds get allocated to fight the fictional dowry menace.
2) More than 126,000 women have been arrested in the last 4 years alone apart from lakhs of elderly citizens , young bright men and even children in the name of dowry harassment by the Indian Police at the behest of a simple complaint.
3) A simple report is enough to put the entire family of the husband behind bars under the draconian section 498A which has been hailed as the weapon of mass destruction by the modern empowered of India
4) The Domestic violence act 2005 , another law considers even talking loudly with the wife an act of violence and the husband and his family can be entangled in a false case under the Domestic Violence act . Lakhs of husbands and his elderly parents have been thrown out of their own homes under this law , by the wives so that she and her family can occupy it .
5) The extortionist police along with the Judiciary are misused by the unscrupulous wife and her family to extort money and torture the families of the Husband . The law provides no punishment or deterrent against misusing the senseless laws and that emboldens criminal wives even further .
6) Even you have not accepted or demanded a single paisa as dowry you can be booked under the anti dowry law . According to the center for social research , 98% of cases filed under the anti dowry law are filed with ulterior motives and are a great source of Income for courts, police and lawyers and families of wives.
7) Young , highly educated and brilliant NRI boys who resist the extortion efforts under section 498A have the dreaded Interpol Red Corner notices put up against their names thereby putting them in the same segment as dreaded criminals and International terrorists. This is done by the Indian police to ensure that these people when returning to India to meet their aged parents are arrested and tortured till they give up to the extortionist demands of the wives family .
8) There are no laws whatsoever to protect men in India. Indian men are considered to be the lying in all cases are not believed by the Media , the Government , the Police or the Judiciary .The Indian man cannot turn for help anywhere when he is in accused falsely with a dowry harassment case or a Domestic violence act.
Young Indian men living in Indian and abroad , you have worked really hard to reach where you are today and the country is proud of you for what you have achieved . Think twice before marrying these thousands of “honest , down to earth, religious , truthful ” and “god-fearing” girls who are hiding in the innumerable Indian matrimonial sites . These are monsters in disguise and once they sign on the dotted line in a marriage solemnization certificate , will not think twice about misusing the Biased and senseless Indian laws to destroy the lives of many a bright young Indian man .
Beware of Marrying an Indian Girl !!!
Indian Men, Beware Of Marriage! We are born in a society where marriage is treated as sacrosanct, something which was fixed in heaven. It is a relationship valid not only in this life but also in lives yet to come. Nevertheless, this relationship is changing and law has played a very important role in altering this relationship. The legislature drafted these laws to protect the vulnerable women in the relationship, but while doing that didn’t keep in consideration abuse of these laws by not so vulnerable women. The judiciary, while sympathizing with the tears of women, didn’t recognize the fact that these may be crocodile tears. Due to these reasons these laws has become a tool to harass husbands, extort money from husbands and their family, to torture hapless women of the husbands family. In short, these laws have made marriage more a legal relationship than a social relationship.
The law presumes, everybody knows laws. Marriage is a voluntary relationship, in the sense that till this point of time there is no law which can compel a man to marry (although in practice some women have compel men to marry them by leveling false allegation of rape against them. The recent case of suicide by an ex-Army officer is a cse in point where the man committed suicide due to pressure to marriage and in case of denial threat of false cases.).Read more:
Thanks a lot to the editor & of course who brought out the news to the common public with the help of such a powerful medium - newspaper. Looking forward for such truth reporting in future too. 498a must go and i agree it is misused.
Kudos to DH. Great article. May the good sense prevail on law creator and they include amendments suggested by Justice J D Kapoor so that only those who commit crime are punished.
Hi,
Thanks for writing such an article which presents the reality of indian marriages and how indians laws destroying families.
If this law is continued another five years there would not be a single house in india which is not affected by 498a and DV act.
Thanks,
Prasad
Sec 498a of IPC is most misued law by greedy, modern urban womens to harassed her husnabd and his family. More and more innocent peoples ane being implicated under this provision. Immidiately this law shoudl be scraped.
498a is such a Draconian law its not funny, is India a democracy? Well arrest without warrant tells me that India is not a democracy, the basic tenant of democracy is innocence until proven guilty. The main proponent of 498a and DV 2005 is one Renuka Choudhary, EX MP now, a true evil minded human who got what was coming the royal boot. Hopefully with her out of the picture some common scene can prevail and 498a laws amended. No one has ever said dowry is right, or that anti dowry laws should not exist, all normal law abiding citizens are saying is make the laws Gender neutral and unbiased. If the taker of dowry is punished so should the giver, if someone truly is harassing for dowry they must be punished to the fullest extent of the law, and the counter being if a False Dowry case is truly false the party making this accusation must be severely punished also. Law must be blind to all not biased as 498a is.
Wonderful writeup sir, I never imagined Deccan Herald will take up such society reforming tasks in full view. We women, have undergone lot of harrasment by such ill-formed DV/498a acts which have broken my family. This above law has almost broke my family, all because of empowerment to some stupid young women(wives). Though I too am a woman I strongly oppose its mis-use.Hope Deccan Herald will bring out many such hidden issues out to open to promote a harmonious family. One final question-Can anyone here show me one family which is having harmony after a Dv/498a on it?? NO way, Once a case comes up in police station, the family is already automatically broken.Wat the world sees thereafter is just a facade in the eyes of society. No love remains....
Priya- you are yet another foolish woman. Why cant you think yourself as sister of a brother, whose wife booked the husband(your brother),sister-in-law(you)and your husband(incase you are married)under DV/498a act?? What fun it would be?? :-) You can relish the joy of being a criminal for no fault of yours. You can sing the above lines like "blackmail" "gross injustice" on yourself by another woman just like you. Probably you do not have a brother,hence you are speaking like this, But i am sure if the same case of false DV/498a is booked on other male members in your family like your father by his daughter-in-law. Would you take pleasure in sufferings of your father & support a false woman who blackmails???I pray to god that you get the oppurtunity to experience such situation in your real life.By the way i too am a woman, who have undergone such abuse of law by dumb foolish women. My advice is -GET REAL & COME OUT OF DELUSIONS.
What do the promoters of these laws want? ... Families without fathers and brothers ? How can it then be a family at all ? Such laws will lead to male foeticide in future as every woman will be afraid to have a son or brother because his marriage can make her a criminal in the eyes of law !!!!!!
How can a so called WEAK Indian woman become an abuser in the eyes of law as soon as her brother / son gets married ? How is this woman believed to have caused Domestic Violence while the wife assumed to be victim of one ? Unmarried sister of the guy, no matter how much tortured by the Bhabhi has no provision to seek protection under DV .....
Why should these women (who put false cases against innocent families) be given maintenance while the sisters and mothers of the guy be just expected to be COMPLETE WOMEN doing all their duties towards the society and family by being a part of the accused list !!
WOMEN EMPOWERMENT in India means WIFE EMPOWERMENT and democracy means just a word for the thousands of Indian families affected by false 498 A and DV cases. Their sons and daughters are expected to earn and maintain the ill minded woman who accused them of false allegations. They have to spend on litigation and face mental harassment. Their daughters are not considered women. Has anyone wondered how among so many women in the family only the wife is considered weak and others can be assumed to have been DONE domestic violence ?
Kudos Mate!!! Good article. Atleast now lawmakers should open their eyes and fix law to reflect fair judgement. We will never go down just because of false cases againsts us. We will fight for justice. We will keep on fighting...fighting....fighting for justice.
Bravo! Deccan Herald has raised a very important issue which is wekecking families across the nation. The law is being subscribed by the unscrupulous women and therefore needs to be made a civil law and gender neutral.
Harassment in a marriage can be caused by both man and a woman on the other.
Great Article Deccan Herald!. You dare to bring truth in front of everyone.
Its Very true today 99.9% cases of DV/498A are just method of money extorsion by harrashing Husband and family.
I request Every Indian MEN to raise voice and Say better i will die bachelor , But i can not put myself and my parents life in danger and sorrow by getting married To indian Gal as We all have lost Trust in institution of marriage.
Better to Live alone and take care of parents rather then to live like a DOG in fear of 498A.
"I wanna Ask Indian Penal Code :- Yeah AAG kab Bujhe ge , Kab tak hum males ko apne wife and uske gharwalo ke torchoures ko sahna hoga.. KAB TAK ...Kuch Kijiya Plz kuch Kijiya ..."
Help Indian Male who is gettinging torchured by wifes and there families ...Please ..if u can not ablish this law just make them Gender Neutral"
Hats off to Deccan herald, you dared to bring the real news to the world. The laws definitely need to be changed. I hope deccan herald has taken up the cudgels to bring justice into the society.
Excellent article by Deccan Herald!
And a Yeomen effort by DH to highlight the misuse of the laws by unscrupulous women!
Unfortunately the loathsome party that passed such laws (without even a debate?) has come back to power.Now we can expect more of these. One silver lining: the loathsome Renuka Choudhary who was a blind supporter of such laws, has been ignominiously defeated in the elections. Hopefully the new govt. will realize the gravity of the matter and frame some SANE laws.
Aprreciate the efforts taken by DH by highlighting the menance and injustice done to Men in name of false dowry cases.. We request similar issues are raised and more people are made aware of these biased laws.
here is list of 498a victims ww w. mynation. net db and another 6000 in our database.
it is not only misused by girls but judiciary support them too.
in this case accuser never came to court for 9 long years, still judge is not dismiss or punishing for misusing the lawRead this victim story w ww. mynation .net abio
here is list of 498a victims and another 6000 in our database.
it is not only misused by girls but judiciary support them too.
in this case accuser never came to court for 9 long years, still judge is not dismiss or punishing for misusing the lawRead this victim story
By: Mallikarjun M. Nalatwad
On: 15 May 2009 10:18 pm
Right step in development of the society. Many good women are misled by the act/laws and try to take advantage just to shake their husbands and end up losing a good and happy married life by losing faith of their husbands for the rest of their lives. Thus getting deprieved of self development opportunities. Hope Deccan Herald continues with these kind of articles and try to open the eyes of the society.
