JOIN USDear Madam,
I have completed my 6th semester B.A. exams, but couldn't clear my 5th semester paper. I had taken psychology, journalism and English as my optional subjects as I wanted to pursue my higher education in psychology without proper planning. Now that I have to wait a year to take up my further education due to my backlog I feel that I have lost completely. I do not know what to do in my future. Whether to look for a job or to wait and pursue my further education. I really need your help. I want to know few courses that I can do in this one year which would help me in future and also tell me what I can do in my further education. Does psychology really have good job prospects? I am a typical introvert and have very poor communication and socializing skills.
Pooja,Bangalore
Dear Pooja
As you probably know, I am not a career counsellor and am in no position to give you advice on what course you should do and what has good job prospects. I would, however, flip the question around in your mind to “what course would you like to do?” You can make a success out of any field you choose, provided you have an interest and passion for it. You may have lost a year in your course, but look at that year in the perspective of your whole life. It is one year, not your whole life, so why would you allow yourself to say you have ‘lost completely’. And consider the infinite possibilities this one year may give you the time to explore for yourself – primary among which may be getting to know yourself better! Consider it as a chance you are getting to explore new avenues and study anything you want, and learn new skills. There are so many wonderful online courses that can open up a whole new world for you. Allow yourself to experience possibilities that you may not have had the chance to explore otherwise. In the context of your whole life, everything is just merely another experience, not a defining moment. All success and failure are transitory. Don’t get too attached to them.
There is no such thing ‘typical’ introvert. You are ‘unique’ and you are special and you have your strengths. Use this time to discover them.
Dear Madam
I have always dreamt of doing something on my own – doing something big. But I have no idea in which field. Now, hopefully in the next couple of years, I will get an idea by looking at the world in a different perspective. My other dream is to provide education to those who cannot afford it. God willing may be after working for about 25 – 30 years (or much less than that) I would like to open a school. I would like to know from you, what are the small but important steps to take as of now in order to achieve my dream.
S P
Dear SP
It is great to dream big and aim high. That shows you a path of where you need to go. However, remember to chart out your path with milestones along the way, so that you know that you are headed in the right direction. Just like you cannot reach an unknown place without a map (and landmarks along the way to show you that you are on the right path), you need to break up your dreams, into smaller, more achievable, milestones that show you your progress, and also keep you on track.You cannot just wake up one day and say today I will fulfill my dream. You will have to secure many ends along the way to get there – financial, professional, emotional, social, physical and so on. For instance, if you know you want to open a school for the under-privileged now, and you are not yet married, you must ensure you get married to someone who shares that dream and can support you and be a part of that journey! Similarly, you must also start planning for it now, financially. Hope this helps
Dear Madam I am doing my 4thsemester Engineering (Medical electronics). As I had done my diploma earlier, I got a seat in BE directly in the second year. I am an above average student but found it difficult to cope with my subjects. Also, due to ill health during the exams, I did not fare well and had five backlogs. I lost a year. I am very depressed and I cannot come out of this depression. When I think about it, I feel scared and cannot stop my tears. I have never had backlogs before and have always performed well. I have cleared the backlogs but feel low about going back to college. I cannot concentrate as before. I don’t want to repeat the same mistake again. Worried Student Dear Student
I understand that you are feeling depressed because you have several backlogs, and you are not used to having them. This is new for you and is probably causing you to feel embarrassed, ashamed, and feel like a failure. Remember, failure is always an event, never a person. So you may have failed at an exam, but that does not mean you are a failure as a person. I have written extensively on this issue in this column and don’t want to sound too repetitive. I urge you to read some of my earlier writings on my blog. You may have lost a year, but what is a year in the perspective of your whole life? You may have lost a year. You do not have to interpret it to mean that you have lost your whole life. How you interpret the fact that you lost a year is entirely your choice and within your control.
www.personalorbitchange.blogspot.in/2010/09/its-not-end-of-road.htmlwww.personalorbitchange.blogspot.in/2010/09/putting-exams-in-perspective.htmlTry and understand what you are most scared about. What is your worst fear? Once you have identified it and named it, you will find it much easier to face. Sometimes you may need help with this and I suggest you get the help of a counsellor. You can also try reaching out to the Parivarthan Counselling Helpline which will give you free access to a counsellor to get you started on your journey to recovery. The number of the helpline is 080-65333323.
Dear Madam,
I am in my final year of BA. Like many students, I am in utter confusion about my career. I am a BE dropout, took up BA just to complete my degree. I feel that I don’t know myself, my interests and skills and am unable to decide my future and this is creating a lot of frustration in me. My teachers have always told me that I am a bright boy but I am starting to doubt myself. Please help me.
JJ
Dear JJ
I think you would benefit from seeing a career counsellor who can help you gain clarity on what career choices will be best for you, given your strengths and interests. I am not a career counsellor so will not be able to help you with that. However, it is critical that you do ‘know’ yourself. The more you know yourself, the more you will be able to understand what drives you, and where your pitfalls lie. You can then create an environment which allows you to build on your strengths, and work on your weaknesses if you would like to overcome them. Again, you will benefit from reading earlier versions of this column which are all available on my blog. Realizing that you are not the only one with this confusion, that there are many students at your juncture in life who are faced with similar dilemmas. You could also read http://personalorbitchange.blogspot.in/2010/09/see-lion-in-mirror.html And if you are still feeling doubtful about yourself, please seek the help of a counsellor.