JOIN USLuckiest Girl Alive
Jessica Knoll
Pan Macmillan
2016, pp 400, Rs 399
Didn’t William Faulkner correctly say, “The past is never dead. It’s not even past.”? Jessica Knoll’s debut novel Luckiest Girl Alive leaves readers with that all-pervading feeling of the overpowering impact of past life on the present. A dark past like that of Knoll’s leading lady, TifAni FaNelli, is definitely not one that anyone can let go off easily.
TifAni, or Ani (Ah-nee) as she prefers to be called now, is a good-looking successful woman, working as the editor of the coveted The Woman’s Magazine and affianced to a blue-blood heir, Luke Harrison. She wears the most fashionable clothes, has access to the magazine’s famous fashion closet and flaunts an enormous family diamond on her perfectly manicured finger. Living a posh life in Manhattan, Ani has definitely come up the hard way with her humble origins from the Main Line, but more emphatically leaving her disastrous past far behind.
Narrated by the protagonist, the book courses through Ani’s past and present, revealing her well-kept secrets and preposterous adventures as a teenager. Ani goes through tremendous pressure to fit in to the haughty environment of the prestigious, private, co-ed Bradley School in Philadelphia. Old money and social class obstruct the way for students like Ani to have a normal and smooth life at Bradley. The easiest and safest way then seems to do all the ‘in-things’ like drinking alcohol, smoking pot, and having boyfriends to draw the attention of the much-talked-about students of the school and be a privileged member of the gang. Unfortunately for Ani, things do not work out smoothly even with her inclusion in that group.
One wrong step leads to another, and Ani is left with a scar for a lifetime. Loaded with fear and guilt, Ani has to undergo plenty of humiliation from fellow students and is marked as one with loose morals. The finale of the drama comes in with the open air shooting at Bradley by 2 mentally deranged students, the deaths of half a dozen kids and Ani’s alleged involvement in the fiasco.
Knoll scores brownie points because of her deep understanding of gender identity and the female body politics. Reminding one of gender theorists like Michael Foucault, Judith Butler and Simon de Beauvoir who had put forward ideas of ‘sexuality as socially constructed’, Knoll’s depiction of Ani’s struggles to alter her identity too borders on pre-destined notions of the society. Ani’s overly sexualised body leads her to her doom from the very beginning of her life. Her heavy breasts and curvy figure mark her as the culprit during a school life incident of smoking pot where she is labelled as the cause of the depravation in the other girls.
It is again her body which becomes the site of enjoyment and sexual fulfillment for the boys in her school. In an attempt to challenge her identity as a victim of sexual abuse, the girls at Bradley even go to the extent of stealing her shorts, soaked in menstrual blood, and hang it the school hall. A connection to this negativity is seen in her job in The Women’s Magazine penning down sexual advice to the readers, things which she comments ironically that most women would feign ignorance of. As Ani grows overly aware of the pressure to curb her vigorous feminine physique, she joins cross-country running at Bradley and later on goes for a strict diet and work-outs in order to gain a size zero figure to manufacture a constructed and socially acceptable female body.
The demons of Ani’s past life feature very often even as she is preparing for her grand Nantucket wedding. Knoll, with the surprising expertise of a much experienced writer, delves into the psyche of her characters and it is not only Ani, but a host of others, who captivate the interest of the readers. Much of the narration takes place to reveal Ani’s mind in turmoil. A cross between a psychological novel and a crime fiction, Knoll’s book takes the readers on a roller-coaster journey to the inner recesses of Ani’s mind which has layers of deep secrets.
Habituated to covering up her bruises with concealer, Ani has got used to covering up her past blunders and mishaps too. However, all her façade is fated to vanish in thin air when she agrees to be a part of a documentary which is being made to commemorate the tragedy at Bradley and also to get an insight into the reality unknown to the masses. Ignoring her mother’s pleas and her fiancé’s disapproval at digging up unpleasant truths, Ani decides to feature in the show primarily to highlight her successful life and marriage, definitely her passport to the new world. If Ani cherishes the dream of a closure to her disturbed and ill-fated past, she does get her share of justice, but not without some more unfurling of bitter truths, heart aches and the loss of loved ones.
Knoll is definitely a writer to watch out for. With a debut novel of this matured stature, hopes have elevated as readers await her next one.