JOIN USI have never felt the necessity to own a vehicle, for I have been ferried by this chauffeur — the driven, versatile and 3-wheeled wonder — auto rickshaw.
Notice how deftly they evade traffic, equipped with a secret gully map; they exhibit no traces of guilt to get onto the footpath and cut across. Some follow the meter scrupulously, while others demand a mood-inspired fancy figure; yet others enrich our vocabulary with hitherto unknown expletives.
I am a fan. They keep me grounded during take-off — over potholes and with the latest gossip, and my plethora of experiences are worthy of chronicling — and I’ve fondly christened them as the Rainbow Men. Here is a dekko...
Vibrant: These are the lively souls. If you happen to hail one, then you have started off well. Animated and well-informed, they are cheerful in exposition; a ready smile and willingness in their demeanour takes you safe and sound to your destination.
Irritable: Brace yourself with a thick skin if you are stuck with this type. They look you top to toe (you begin to cringe by then with all thoughts wandering to something amiss). Some don’t mind scowling at the choice of your destination. By now they have adroitly communicated enough of your deplorable choice; a harmless visit to a crowded locality is enough to invite their ire. Nevertheless, they agree to ferry you, but with contempt. You begin to wonder why in the first place they had to agree to the commute.
Bold and benevolent: These are the Samaritans of the society. They don’t hesitate to stop to help, fight for their rights, or assist an injured person. They are well-informed and participate in intelligent talk. We swell in pride for their integrity.
Greedy: A disgusting lot. They don’t hesitate to demand extra from you. If you are in a hurry or new to the place, it delights them all the more. The wee hours are their haven. They fleece the old and gullible.
They are equipped with a psychological analysis of your situation. ‘Take it or leave it’ is their motto. They are often lazy and drop you off anywhere but at the agreed destination — reasons are dime a dozen.
Yielding and accommodating: The sweet lot. They help you search an address without any extra demands; you automatically pay them for their kindness. If you are a non-local, they are proactive enough to deposit you comfortably. They keep the faith in humanity soaring.
Ostentatious: Flashy and pretentious, they flaunt their gadgets (one even had a Bluetooth). They come with Halloween-inspired dressing and funny hairstyles (often giving an impression that the rats have been at it). FM being their nerve tonic, the address is taken over the din. It reflects in their driving skills too — expecting a gasp from you. The moment you recognise this type, you are advised to pamper their egos with a lift of the brow or an ‘oh-ah’, else they will be pursuing tricks on the road till they draw your attention. By now your heart has already entered the throat.
Rowdy/raging: Wild and unruly, god help you if you are travelling with one. They need loud, bawdy music to pump the adrenaline. They derive pleasure in screaming at hapless pedestrians. Suddenly they hum a sleazy number, stealing glances at you in the rear-view mirror. Your discomfort is their amusement. Keep your fingers crossed and curse your luck, silence is golden at such times. And do get down well ahead. You deserve the walk to compose yourself.
A heavy dose of adventure is assured on a commute with the VIBGYOR men. Need to rush to someplace? Hail an auto.