When school is cool...

TEACHERS' DAY Wasn't school a fun place to be

How could Ritu have lost the only keys to the class cupboard? Why does Ketan not utter a word throughout class? Was Pranit just being funny when he cracked that joke or was it something else? Does Varun really have to answer all the questions all the time?

Do unresolved mysteries of the classroom keep you up at night? Would you like to know what’s driving that crazy, hilarious, exasperating and inexplicable stuff which your students do? We know the answer is a thumping yes. So we have coaxed a few of the students from your class to write a letter to you. While they think they are just wishing their teacher on Teachers’ Day, we are hoping you’ll wade through wonderland and get to the bottom of it all.

So read on and have a wonderful Teachers’ Day!

Dear Teacher,

Happy Teachers’ Day! You know we would really like to be those copybook students who always listen to their teachers and do as they bid, but we are not. We love you to bits even though it may seem that the only job assigned to us is to exasperate you. To make you realise that we are not just imps out to trouble you, here’s a little love note from us. We thought a lot about how we could make things easier for you and this is what we think would help.

Keep calm and teach on

•  …even if you discover a frog hopping towards your desk. It will do you no harm. It is a creature made by God; please maintain your Zen state and smile at us. Remember what Maria did when the Von Trapp kids shoved a frog into her pocket? Didn’t it leave the kids crying over their folly and feeling miserable?
  
•  …when you realise that last week’s homework has not yet been completed, even forgotten. In fact, take a deep breath and let it go. Forgiveness is a virtue.
  
•  …when 20 of us kids want to speak to you simultaneously. It may be cacophony to your ears, but truly it’s our love. We know perfectly well that you have only two ears that can understand one human being at one time. But please understand we are in awe of you; you are our daily celebrity.
  
• …while we, sitting in class, turn, shift, express and speak. We love to interact with our surroundings. When you catch us in the act, please try and view us as if we were baby squirrels looking for food. Now now, we don’t seem so annoying, do we?
  
• …if our constant questioning makes you want to resign from your job, think of what wonderfully opinionated individuals you are raising, and you will abort that thought right away. We are going to be people who will not be doormats, and have a great deal to say at all times. Or maybe you could think of how difficult it will be out-shouting us all and you might abandon the mission.

Patience, thy name is teacher

At teaching school, they never told you the murky details about the profession. Nobody would become a teacher if they did! But we are training you on the job! Even if it does seem pesky, somebody’s got to do the job. So we’ve jotted down some tips for you, to work on the P-word.

Patience pays…

• When we come to you for the umpteenth time to ask if you want us to write “your talking” or “you’re talking”, and again, to ask if it makes any difference writing either of them.
  
• When we turn up in sports uniform for a class photograph.
  
• When we forget to write our names and roll numbers on our assignments and they get ‘misplaced’.
  
• When we, especially us backbenchers, have a little chat and laugh. We need to be taken with a pinch of salt. Ignore and we shall be quiet. Or at least, we could try.

Things that might help!

How do you handle us, mighty annoying creatures, with a smile and a charming expression? Ignoring us might be a little difficult considering we can be pretty much in your face, so here’s what you can do:

• Music in your ears: When we get too much to handle, shield yourself with some invisible earphones. With music feeding into you, you can continue smiling beatifically at us while we behave like complete nincompoops.
  
• Focus on something you like: Maybe visualising your favourite food when we are being terrible, or your favourite cartoon character when we give you a migraine, might help you calm down.
  
• Recall your students days: You did these things too, didn’t you? Bunking class, speaking in loud whispers, making squeaky noises and weaving ghost stories, ‘forgetting’ homework, and every other trick in the book? We are just little yous.

Have a great Teachers’ Day, our dear teachers. Don’t forget how much we love you!