Recently, at a social event, I overheard a callow youngster, with supercilious attitude, snootily saying, “Even if I’m on the wrong track, whatsoever I can’t bring myself saying ‘sorry’ to anyone, as I’m superlatively egoistic!”
It looked as though she was making a style statement by uttering that, which in reality reflects the rustic and unrefined character.
Interestingly, in life, we come across many such humans, who claim to be highly egoistic, but conveniently shove aside their ego, during times where it’s actually needed! In other words, at wrong times/places, we extravagantly exhibit our ego (like in relationships, where there shouldn’t be any space for ego!), and the times where it’s required most, we merrily forget to display it.
For instance, while driving vehicles on roads, we have no ego in earning expletives from cops and co-drivers, by flouting traffic rules. We have no ego in jumping queues at various places, involving in altercations with people around. We have no ego in dodging official duties, inviting animosity from co-workers. (We even have no ego in taking credit for the work we haven’t done!) At home-front, we have no ego in claiming property rights, without having rightly executed our filial duties, or other domestic duties.
And, we have no ego in camping at relatives’ places while on pleasure tours, enjoying free lodge and board, without shelling out a penny to reciprocate their hospitality. We have no ego in battening on a friend’s generosity, like a parasite, to enjoy free hotel/film trips, at his/her cost. In short, we have no ego in exploiting people’s goodness, and extracting all kinds of help from them.
But strangely we feel egoistic to do even teensy-weensy good things in return. We feel egoistic to say ‘thanks’ for the help we have received. We feel egoistic to say ‘sorry’ for the wrong things we have committed. We feel egoistic to wish a person good things on special occasions. We feel egoistic to congratulate people on their success in something.
Or compliment someone over some good thing in him/her, be it about his/her good looks, or talent, or intelligence, or good nature. We feel egoistic in reciprocating someone’s good gestures towards us. In nutshell, we don’t have the ego in ‘receiving’ good things from others, but feel egoistic and below our dignity, while ‘returning’ back same good things to people.
Interestingly, all these aforesaid things show streaks of ‘negative ego’ in a person. Then what exactly is the ‘true ego’ or ‘positive ego’? A person is said to be truly egoistic, when he is imbued with surfeit self-pride, wherein he refrains from sponging upon others, taking undue advantage of their goodness. Also, a person is considered truly egoistic when he is fully self-reliant, living life on self-dictated terms, adhering to high moral values and principles, ideologies, such that none can point a finger against him in anything!