One has to only get beyond self and one’s miseries to find a world full of opportunities for outreach. Maybe not the exciting glittering kind you imagined as being a mark of success, but from personal experience, I declare that this is far beyond what the world at large regards as successful. Yet, one need not fade into oblivion but rather become an inspiration and icon.
At age 37, severe Rheumatoid Arthritis struck me. Initially, I would ponder within, “What’s the use of living like this? You cannot even pick up a glass of water sometimes, or bathe, dress and groom yourself”. Fortunately, there is the other side of me which counters, “Nothing doing, you’re a fighter, you’re a brave person. You still have a lot of talent you can use, not only for yourself but for others too!”
My mother sparked this attitude. With 35 years of RA behind her, and 25 of them mostly housebound, she kept herself busy as best she could, passing on at 86.
‘Armchair Ministry’ is what I classified as her special talent. She attracted visitors, making them feel welcome, whatever be the inconvenience or the pain she was suffering. She loved the garden, music and all that went on in our lives. She touched others with her special letters, written with struggling, stiff, gnarled fingers. If she could do so much sitting in one place, how much more can I, with still a fair degree of mobility and a computer to boot?
When at times my pain is worse, I reach out to God. This has come out very strong in me — a kind of total surrender to the power of God as I know that there is nothing we can do without his help. And help he does! It is not that the pain suddenly vanishes or the problem goes away, but I’d find later that someone had touched my life in some way that day, which would have made my burden easier to bear. It might have been a surprise visitor or gift package, a phone call, or email to say hello or a compliment on an article I wrote.
At times, of course, these do not happen and everything seems to go wrong. I do fret and fume initially, then realise it’s not solving my problem, and all will pass if I remain quiet. Perhaps a forced ‘cooling off’ from overdoing things was actually a sign of another miracle, albeit in its own way.
Win, don’t whine, is my mantra…