Retain control of 'your result'

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Retain control of 'your result'

Dear Madam,
I am studying in PUC II. I was doing well till Class 8 but after that I started losing interest in studies. I am not saying that I can’t study, but I get bored. If I sit down to study, I can’t concentrate on the subjects. This has affected my scores. In PUC I, I scored 70 per cent. Every week, I have tests at the tuition classes that I am attending and I am not able to prepare well. Please help me. I want to pursue an engineering degree from a reputed college and become a successful engineer.
XYZ

Dear XYZ,
Try and think about what changed for you after Class 8. Why did your interest drop? Were there, or are there, any distractions that are keeping you from focussing on what you need to do. What is your motivation to study? Are you doing it for yourself, and your brighter future, or are you doing it under pressure from the environment and because your parents are forcing you to. If you are doing it for someone else, I can understand why you are getting bored, because it is then a chore to be done. You do not see any benefit in it for yourself.
I am happy to hear you say that you can do it, it is just that you don’t want to do it. So you do believe that you are capable of it, and the only thing holding you back, is yourself. That is a much better situation to be in because then everything is within your control. It is situations outside your control that are much more difficult to deal with. If the only thing holding you back is yourself, then I am sure that once you realise that the beneficiary of your studying is none other than you, you will find the motivation to do it. If you study and do well, the person who benefits the most is you, not your parents or anyone else in your life. If you want to become an engineer, and that to from a top college, then there is no short-cut to putting in effort. However, till you believe the effort is being done for someone else, it will always remain a chore. Once you realise it is for yourself, you will start enjoying the journey and focussing on it instead of focussing only on the destination. If your goal is to climb Mount Everest, there is no other way to get there, other than enjoying the journey and the process. If you don’t enjoy trekking and consider the journey as torturous, the peak will remain an unattainable goal. If you enjoy trekking, then, even if you eventually don’t make it to the ultimate goal, at least you have enjoyed the trek.
So, reexamine your motivation, and enjoy the journey.

Dear Madam,              
I am studying in PUC II and I am interested in doing Aeronautical Engineering. For this, I have decided to take the AIEEE, but my parents are constantly opposing it. A fortune teller has informed them that I will not be successful if I take that exam. How can  I convince my parents to believe otherwise? And, in case I do not get admission to an engineering college, can I go for pilot training? Is it true that a pilot license could cost me lakhs of rupees?   
Keerthi

Dear Keerthi,
Your parents are probably anxious about your future and are, therefore, seeking inputs from fortune tellers. Unfortunately, when we get these inputs, and try to predict our future, we start believing in them, and they become like self-fulfilling prophecies. You will start believing that anyway I will not do well in this exam, because that is what the fortune teller has said, so why should I study hard. If you don’t study hard, you will not do well. The fortune teller’s prophecy will come true and you will start believing that what the fortune teller told you (or your parents) was indeed true. My advice for you is to retain control of your results with you. Don’t give it up to someone who has no interest or influence in the matter. If you believe you can do it, then just do it and give it your best shot, irrespective of what anyone is saying. And, if you make a mistake along the way, don’t worry — just view it as a stumbling block on your path.
I think it would be wise for you to sit with your parents, and understand their anxieties. Are they financial or are they based on what the fortune teller has said? If you really want to pursue this course, then you may need to look into the financial aspects and see the feasibility of taking an educational loan. Don’t let fortune tellers determine your course of action. You are your best fortune teller. If you believe you can do it, you will find a way to do it. And, even if you don’t make it to the top colleges, I am sure some other opportunities will open up for you. When one door closes, another one opens — we just need to look for it, and allow the possibility of it.
There are many students who focus on the professional entrance exams in preference to the Board exams, and they are comfortable with that choice. It is really your call. I am not a career counsellor and so will not be able to give you details on the course, and which course you should study. Yes, I have heard, that getting a pilot’s license is very expensive.
Good luck.

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