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Covid-19 crisis: Pandemic parenting in a whirlpool amidst fears of a third wave

Kids are getting to spend plenty of time with their parents but they are ‘caged’ at home, without any physical activity, and this has affected them
nupama Ramakrishnan
Last Updated : 17 May 2021, 13:45 IST
Last Updated : 17 May 2021, 13:45 IST
Last Updated : 17 May 2021, 13:45 IST
Last Updated : 17 May 2021, 13:45 IST

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"The world needs a wash and a week’s rest," WH Auden penned in The Age of Anxiety. Reflections of a painful time in history. The age of anxiety has overstayed though. The horrors unfolded by a merciless pandemic vouches that collective misery is no less in 2021.

Raising kids, to be precise, in these trying times, has been a rollercoaster ride for parents — the fears of a third wave looming around, only adding to the agony.

Bratati Roychowdhary, a mother of two young girls — aged nine and four — has been on her toes. Over the last year, she has been adapting herself to pandemic parenting. But with a deadly virus hovering around, she is worried. “I just hope before the third wave comes, as a nation, we prepare ourselves with enough paediatric health infrastructure,” she said.

The pandemic has, indeed, deprived teenagers of their freedom; stolen childhood from kids.

“Being inside for more than a year now has taken a toll on the immunity of all urban kids,” Bratati said. “No matter how much nutritious food we put on their plate, the real immune power forms at this age — by playing outside on the mud. This was anyway rare, now it’s defunct.”

Bratati’s kids loved playing outside. Screen time was an occasional affair. And then pandemic happened. Settling into her daughters’ online studies and working from home took some time for her to adjust. She quit her job recently.

The kids are getting to spend plenty of time with their parents but they are ‘caged’ at home, without any physical activity, and this has affected them, she explained. “I see increased stubbornness, especially with the younger one. Lack of social exposure has impacted her behaviour as her age is meant for mingling with friends.”

Young adults are slowly getting used to the imposed norm. But growing up in the midst of uncertainty, fear, disease and deaths is taking a toll on them. Every day brings in new challenges for them.

The question then is how prepared the parents should be for the third wave, if it happens.

Dr Deepak Krishnamurthy, the father of a 13-year-old son, is apprehensive. A Senior Consultant - Interventional Cardiology, he said, continuing online schooling from home is the best protection we have against Covid infection in children.

He explained that adults who go out to work are the ones who bring the virus home. So, once home, one needs to preferably take a bath and change clothes before getting in contact with children, he said.

Children, he pointed out, should be taught to wash their hands frequently and wear a mask whenever they go outside home. "Avoid going out of home as much as possible,” he said. “If there is a maid or cook or nanny visiting your home, make sure that family members and kids are masked up appropriately. Do not allow staff with symptoms to come home.”

As the scramble for vaccines continues and the common man runs from pillar to post to get themselves inoculated, parents feel it would be quite a wait for their children too before they get their shots.

Vaccination for children

Dr Deepak mentioned that If the Pfizer vaccine, which has evidence in children, is approved and becomes available in India, it will be a good thing. “Still, cost and logistics are concerns for us that need to be addressed,” he said.

“Bharat Biotech trials are also underway. Hopefully, it should be safe and available for children soon,” he added.

By all accounts, how the next wave is going to be is something only the future can lay out. The responsibility of protecting children becomes paramount at the moment.

“This is a new virus with unprecedented circumstances, so all hypothesis and predictions are just that -- hypothetical scenarios,” Dr Seema Misra, a consultant paediatrician and neonatologist, opined on the third wave.

“This time around also, one has seen an increasing trend — of the child in the family getting infected first and then passing on the infection to elders. Since recommendations have not yet come in for vaccination in less than 18 years of age, we are expecting a surge of infections among them in the next wave,” she said.

‘Parents should not let their guard down’

Parents should not let their guard down after the second wave starts waning off, Dr Seema emphasised. “The only thing which works to prevent getting infected is not multivitamins, steaming or putting oil in the nose; it’s masking, social distancing and frequent hand-washing.”

Urging parents to not believe in WhatsApp forwards, Dr Seema’s advice to parents is to get children vaccinated against all preventable diseases of childhood that are included in the vaccination schedule on time. “Try not to delay them due to the fear of catching the disease. Take all precautions and get it done.”

In Bengaluru, like other places, various pandemic-related issues among children/teenagers are on the rise. Obesity is one of them.

“Physical and mental well-being measures for children should not take a backseat in this pandemic,” Dr Deepak said. “Minimise screen time - be it with TV, PC, devices or video games. Instead, make them read age-appropriate books and enroll them for music lessons, coding or other hobbies. There are various resources to help children work out at home too.”

He cites stationary bicycle, flexibility-enhancing yoga and meditation as great stressbusters for young minds and board games and indoor games as a good opportunity for parents to bond with children. “Watching movies and TV can be given a stipulated time of few hours per week too, to beat the boredom,” he said.

Moreover, he feels children should be taught cooking, sewing and other lifeskills in their free time. “Make them do some household chores which builds a sense of responsibility and ownership.”

But most importantly, Dr Deepak feels parents should sit and talk to children about the pandemic, what is happening around and reassure them.

“Don’t brush away their concerns and fears or commit the mistake of avoiding talking about these issues altogether."

Psycho-social issues of kids, teenagers

Parents should not let their guard down, explained Dr Seema. Developmental delay in infants that is undetected is a constant worry for paediatricians,” she said adding, “for teenagers staying at home always, FOMO (fear of missing out), missing hanging out with friends where stress levels are negated, increase in screen time are some issues that lead to constant conflict in the house and depression.

If the child shows symptoms of Covid…

“In case the child shows symptoms of Covid, contact your GP or paediatrician and get tested,” said Dr Deepak.

He also emphasised that it is important not to panic in front of the child and to maintain calm and composure in times of stress. “Isolation and monitoring for temperature and oxygen levels with an oximeter are crucial. Do not over medicate your child based on hearsay knowledge. Keep them on a nutritious diet,” he said.

The silver lining for Bratati is her children’s love for books. “The good part is I could manage the screen time of my kids because they love reading books,” she said.
“Engaging them in household chores and fixing a board game and storytime, baking together helped,” she said. “Having both of them made it much easier as they spent a lot of time playing together.

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Published 17 May 2021, 10:25 IST

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