“Respect is one of the greatest expressions of love“ said Miguel Angel Ruiz, summing up the emotion beautifully. But how respectful are we in daily life? Do we listen attentively when someone is speaking to us or we are part of an audience at a meeting? Do we greet people warmly or in a genuine fashion? A VIP I know has a funny way of shaking hands with those he considers unimportant to him. While limply accepting a pro-offered hand, he will look the other way!
There are others who have no respect for a person’s time – and make it a habit to have people wait – be it for payments rightfully due or before granting an audience. Yet others are notorious for showing up late or by not honouring deadlines.
Disrespect can come through in words and tone of voice too. Do we shout, scream and terrorise people when we speak? Even a baby can sense when it is being yelled at and will react in pain. If headstrong humans feel that treating others with disrespect makes them feel important, they deserve to be only pitied.
Do we selectively show respect to those whom we think we might need for a variety of reasons and treat others shabbily – for example a so-called semi-literate farmer who has invaluable domain expertise (a recently released Tamil movie Kadaisi Vivasayi drove home this point so well) or a long-distance driver with his own unique skills, that one does not possess.
How respectfully a person treats others tells us a lot. Albert Einstein said, “l speak to everyone in the same way whether it is the garbage man or the president of the university.” When people in positions of power are asked legitimate questions by the public the reactions are usually extreme - point-blank refusal to answer or alluding that the questioner does not merit a response. This smacks of arrogance and lack of respect and an opportunity to educate the questioner - if he/she is indeed less qualified - is missed.
It is not just about respecting our seniors in age. Hierarchies have been turned topsy turvy today. Even people in their seventies sometimes have to take the help of kids and grandkids when using a mobile phone or installing an app or navigating a website.
As the old adage goes, give respect and take respect, respect begets respect almost always in the final analysis.