An enjoyable diet

I seem to have an inherent lack of enthusiasm for any kind of physical exercise and would any day prefer to bury my nose in a book instead of pointless running about while playing a game. I often ‘bunked’ the sports period in school on some pretext or the other and escaped into the blissful sanctuary of the library.

I was painfully thin as a child even though I was fond of eating. As I grew into an adult, I felt blessed to be able to eat anything without putting on an ounce of weight. Unfortunately, this happy state of affairs did not last long.

Then the question became, “How do I control my rising weight while still avoiding exercise?” The answer was simple, “Go on a diet!” So I tried several diets—the no sugars, no rice, no fried foods, no processed ready-made foods. In other words, no tasty food.

One day, I read an article in an old issue of the Reader’s Digest that said, “if nobody saw you eat it, it doesn’t count.” Finally, I had found the perfect diet—eat whatever you want when no one is looking and then nibble on greens like a martyr in front of the family at the dining table! Until then, I hadn’t realised that I’d been dieting for years!

Since I spend most of my mornings alone in the kitchen, preparing breakfast and lunch, I have easy access to all kinds of tasty tidbits. When I open the fridge to take out the coriander leaves or green chillies, can I be blamed for scoffing a handful of fresh grapes from an open bowl? When I take out some almonds and cashews to roast them to make gravy, it can’t be wrong to pop a few in my mouth, can it?

How can I test the dishes for salt, if I don’t taste them? It’s also necessary to eat chapati with the dish to see how the combination has turned out. The author of the article also wrote that the fries he eats don’t count because he eats them off his children’s plates. I used to do something similar when my children were small.

Then there are times when I feel quite peckish between meals. This is when I raid the biscuit tin and the laddoo dabba. After all, one has to keep body and soul together. No one is around then, no one sees me, so it doesn’t count! The only sad part about this diet is that it doesn’t work!