The great dilemma of a first-time voter

Turning 18 can be eventful and life-changing. You get to be a part of democracy. Trust me, most teens await this. For me, I think it all started at the dinner table conversations with my parents. Like most normal Indians, the prime-time news on the television screen is a constant companion at dinner time. From defecting MLAs to the disqualification of MPs and the infamous Bollywood drug bust, we have been through it together. We debated about it, argued about it, and, in the end, agreed to disagree with each other, marking the end of another glorious dinner. Consequently, politics has always interested me.

As a now 19-year-old student of B.A. LL.B. (Hons.), politics is a part of my life and curriculum. What makes politics so interesting? It is, in my opinion, just another never-ending soap opera with much more sophistication, budget, consequences, and drama. However, the differences between an Indian soap opera and Indian politics are many. The latter impacts our lives; the former, our mental health.

Another distinction I observed is that politics has way fewer women involved than the serial industry. Having watched and enjoyed many episodes of the Great Indian Political Drama, I am now faced with a very important task. Electing a worthy candidate. Casting my vote and saving democracy.

As eager as I am to use my voter ID for the first time ever, I have many questions running through my mind. How do I choose the right candidate? My course of action was what any 19-year-old faced with a problem would do. Google. I sat down and googled the candidates contesting in my constituency, went through their educational qualifications, saw that they had no criminal records, and went through their work so far. I ended up being more confused than ever.

Asking people around for help was of no use either. The most common suggestion was to cast my vote for whatever party I admired. The one thing born out of watching loud prime-time debates and endlessly scrolling through my father’s Twitter feed where liberals and right-wing supporters both made sense was indecisiveness. I am not a partisan person. I believe each party has its advantages and disadvantages. And it is exhausting to pledge allegiance to one party, defend their wrongs, and hail their rights daily.

Another thought I have been fiddling with of late is how effective pressing the NOTA would be. When I voiced this, I was met with a very angry relative of mine, shouting at me that voting NOTA is synonymous with not voting at all, and I would be an anti-nationalist if I did so. As an Indian, NOTA was not an option. Because I love my country and am a nationalist. But what would happen if the NOTA votes exceeded the votes gained by other candidates? Well, there seems to be no fixed answer to this.

Another question I had as a first-time voter was: how would my vote matter if the candidate I cast my vote for decided to leave the current party and join hands with another party that was totally against my ideology? I would feel betrayed, to say the least.

I am glad that these thoughts share a space in my brain, apart from my end-semester exam worries. But there is not a lot to complain about with election season upon us.

The roads are getting better, the promises are getting more creative, and the days are getting longer (that is just summer, not politics). I still have not zeroed in on a candidate to vote for. But it does make me question how effective democracy is if people’s choices, in the end, are just trails of regret.