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'Friendship' can teach us a lot about life

Last Updated : 06 August 2019, 08:05 IST
Last Updated : 06 August 2019, 08:05 IST
Last Updated : 06 August 2019, 08:05 IST
Last Updated : 06 August 2019, 08:05 IST

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Friendship Day… this day is supposed to bring a smile on our face and push us into the realm of thoughts, cherishing those 'special' moments with a friend. After all, it is because of friends that our life feels so complete and we are now dedicating a day for celebrating friendship, togetherness, and compatibility.

But then, why do many of us fail to recall those friends who are known to us for decades? Do such friends exist at all? Here we are not talking about the virtual existence of such friends on Facebook or Instagram.

To try and answer that question, we need to understand the types of friendship that exist today. Not everyone we know can match up with our vibes and that's why we don't consider every known person to be our friend. So that further narrows it down for us to look for a specific trait, something we are comfortable with for sharing our thoughts and everything. And who can sometimes, if not always, help us to bring out the best in us.

Facets of friendship


A friend who is smart, with whom our vibes match, who is loyal and honest, who helps you to feel comfortable all the time, is the best one can ask for. But they are also rare to find. What we generally come across is something like this:

A certain type of friend exists in many of our lives, someone whom we might greet with a big smile upon a sudden meeting but might ignore to reply to their WhatsApp messages or answer their phone calls. This type of friendship can be noted down as an ambivalent one.

A frenemy is the type of friend who often brings you down but you tend to be forgiving towards such people. This kind of friend will often push you to do well in your life but not better than them. Since you get along with that friend, you might not acknowledge these toxic attributes.

Toxic friendships are those in which our friend can't just simply be happy about anything good about us. They often try to hold us in low self-esteem, using our emotions as a tool to bring down the confidence. Needless to say, a friendship like this can be very stressful and can take a huge toll on life.

There is also a trend where people want to be friends with the popular girl/ guy in the college or with someone who is famous at the workplace. But this type of aspirational desire for a specific type of friend can be unsuccessful as it depends on that other 'popular' person to bloom the friendship in the first place.

Research suggests that depressed friends can add negativity in your life as well. As that person is drowned in depression, he/ she will start portraying the world in a grim and negative light. Even staying in touch with such friends can be detrimental.

Cultivating the bond

Well, we all need friends. Some of us can't live without them, while some choose only one or two and consider them special. But we all do need them. Science suggests friendship boosts longevity and there are other psychological and physical health benefits associated with it.

Friendship is vital and there's no denying that. It helps us to grow, motivates us, and most importantly, teaches us something about life itself. The experience can be positive and negative and that is because life is full of ups and downs. It cannot be a smooth journey always.

Although we all expect the relationship to be long-lasting, the phase where a good friendship starts wearing off suddenly is difficult to deal with.

Therefore, before investing time and effort, it's better to know the worth of the friendship. We need to try and understand maturely and before doing so, knowing oneself is equally important.

Bollywood's portrayal of friendship is often far beyond the horizon of reality. Counting on that to decode the core meaning of friendship can be perniciously misleading.

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Published 04 August 2019, 09:09 IST

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