Exams are just one path to success

Ask Your Counsellor

Dear Madam,

I generally cover the complete syllabus before an exam. But in the exam hall I often forget what I have studied. Also, at times I won’t be in a mood to study. Please let me know how to overcome these issues.

Ranjith

Dear Ranjith,

Often when we are very anxious about the exam and believe that our success in life depends on our success in the exam, our short-term memory gets overloaded with these thoughts and we blank out about what we are meant to write in the exam. It is important to understand your fears around the exams and how you are interpreting them. Exams are just a milestone you must cross on your life’s journey. They in no way define whether you are a success or a failure in life. Your being successful in life depends on several other things like your ability to communicate, to lead, to be a team player, to problem-solve and think out of the box, your confidence in yourself, etc.

Exams don’t even figure on the list but somehow, we are made to believe that they are the one and only determinant of success and therefore they become this scary monster we all get terrified by. Focus on the learning and focus on putting in your best effort. Don’t worry about the marks because they have very limited value. If you would like to gain a deeper understanding of this, please talk to a counsellor who will be able to help you.

Dear Madam,

I am in Class 12 and am unable to prepare well for my exams. I had studied properly for my Boards that were initially supposed to be held in March but after the exams got postponed, I have not been able to study. These exams are very crucial, but I am not able to concentrate. Kindly help.

Monisha

Dear Monisha,

I can only attempt to try and understand how confusing, distressing and disappointing the current environment must be for you, and for all students who were taking exams, especially the Board exams. There is a certain momentum that we build up over the year, and that came to a halt with the application of a sudden unexpected break. It is good to know that you are not alone in this situation. The entire student body is facing the same situation. These exams may be important, but you must remember that they are not the only determinants of your success and failure in life. These exams will only open some doors and if one door does not open, another one will. There is not only one path to success. There are many paths. And you can make a success of any path you go down. We get stressed because we often believe that there is only one path to your success and if you don’t do well in an exam you will not get onto the only successful path there is.

Please remember, these exams are not going to decide your future. You are going to decide your future. Your success in life will depend on what you make of whichever path you go down. The exam is not a goal in itself, it is just a milestone on the side of the path you choose to go down, once you cross it, it is irrelevant. Focus on enjoying the journey instead.

Dear Madam,

Since the past month or so, I am feeling quite low. I have mood swings. Sometimes I feel happy and suddenly I feel sad. When I feel sad, the emotions are rather intense, I feel hopeless and worthless. I feel there is nothing good in the world or nothing good in my life. I don’t know why this is happening for nothing serious happened in the recent past. Kindly help.

Kiran

Dear Kiran,

I would really urge you to get some help to sift through your thoughts and beliefs that are leading you to feel hopeless and worthless.

Staying with these thoughts for a long period of time is probably not something pleasant for you and you will greatly benefit from reaching out to a counsellor who can guide you about next steps. All the best.