Parental influence on kids

Parents put forth their best effort to ensure the holistic growth of a child, catering to both physical and mental needs. In today’s world, where emotional quotient is as important as intelligence quotient, it is prudent to nurture children with values that help them face the challenges of life when they are adults. Here are a few parenting tips:

Be an example: Home is the first school for a child. Children often seek parental support to tackle a problem. Whatever is told to them verbally has lesser impact than what the child sees you doing. So make sure that you act in a similar way as you want your child to be. Be an example to your child. If you eat junk food, you cannot make your child eat healthy food. If you are binge watching a series, you cannot dictate your child to read a book.

Talk, talk, talk: Communication is key to building a strong relationship. Talking and explaining how you dealt with a situation, under a certain circumstance, helps children learn to cope with different situations. Also, discussing a problem with the children, and asking about their opinion, makes your child more confident to deal with real-life scenarios. This also builds trust among family members and strengthens the bond.

Appreciate the good work: Appreciation acts as a positive reinforcement and makes the child redo it again and again to get recognition. If something is done on a regular basis, it will get transformed into a habit or behaviour. Appreciation not only helps inculcate good habits but also makes children more confident and positive about their acts.

Have patience: In this fast moving life, where everything is available at one’s fingertips, parenting a child requires a lot of time and patience. You cannot instil moral values or good habits in a child in hours or days or months. It takes years of persistent positive parenting to make a better human being out of an innocent child. Don’t treat your child as a robot who works on your directions and obeys your command, without any reasoning. The child may disobey you, question you, argue with you, go against your wishes but make sure you deal with these critical situations with patience and with highest level of intelligence. Intelligent handling of a critical situation helps define the future trajectory of your child.

Be reasonable: Whenever you act differently to a particular situation, give a logical explanation to the child. Don’t lecture the child to instil moral values. Explanation of the facts and practical application have a lasting impact. Rules of the house should be based on logical reasoning and not on arbitrary assumptions.

(The author is a paediatric neurologist)