Bengaluru scores high on ‘cheating index’, emotional dissatisfaction being key reason

Infidelity, though not new, is reportedly rising in Bengaluru, driven by unmet needs, emotional dissatisfaction, and lack of intimacy, say relationship experts and divorce lawyers. The extramarital app Gleeden also highlights the city’s prominence on India’s “cheating map”.

Bengaluru accounts for 17 per cent of Gleeden’s India users, mostly 30-45-year-old professionals. “Emotional dissatisfaction is the main reason for joining, with many seeking emotional rather than physical companionship,” country manager Sybil Shiddell tells Metrolife. About 65 per cent of users are men, 35 per cent women, largely from affluent finance, law, engineering, or entrepreneurial backgrounds.

The app's Infidelity Study 2025 surveyed 1,510 people aged 18-60 across 12 cities. “In Bengaluru, 29 per cent admitted to flirting on social media, while 53 per cent reported some form of infidelity — 7 per cent physical, 12 per cent emotional and 34 per cent both,” explains Shiddell.

City-based relationship experts say most clients seeking help are in their 30s-50s, and infidelity does not always lead to divorce.

Psychologist Nithya J Rao of Becoming Shanta, a mental and holistic wellbeing centre, says over half of her cases this year involved relationship issues, with around 20 per cent linked to adultery. “The partners in an affair are often sought to fill an emotional void or compensate for mismatched compatibility. Depending on the need, the cheating partner may turn to the workplace or a dating app,” she explains.

Priya Vardharajan, founder of Durga India, a non-profit focused on women’s safety and gender equity, notes adultery cases have risen by 40 per cent in five years. “When women come to us, many women initially cite emotional distance or lack of intimacy, but deeper conversations reveal infidelity,” she says.

Consultant clinical psychologist Muniswamy K S adds monthly cases have risen from about 60 to 100. “Affairs existed before, but limited communication prevented full-fledged relationships. Now calls, texts, and video chats make them easier to sustain," he adds. 

Most cases involve men aged 27-38 from middle- and upper-middle-class families; women are typically under 35. “Most extramarital relationships develop from familiarity — colleagues or friends — starting with emotional support and later becoming physical,” explains Muniswamy.

Manifold requests

City detective agencies say workplaces are the most common setting for affairs, followed by social circles, with social media making connections easier. Behavioural changes such as reduced communication, being overprotective of their phone, and defensiveness, often raise suspicion.

A surveillance expert at Garuda Detective Services, J C Nagar, says suspected infidelity cases have jumped from 2-3 per month in 2020 to over 40 now. “About 90 per cent of our cases involve such investigations. Around 60 per cent of clients are men suspecting wives and 40 per cent are women checking on their husbands. Women in affairs are typically 35-55 and men are aged 26-48,” he observes. 

"Clients come to us when their partners start hiding phones, changing passwords, or deflecting blame. Some affairs have gone undetected for over 15 years,” he adds.

Purushotham Mesta of Rajdhani Detective Agency, Vijayanagar, notes a three- to four-fold increase over five years, with 60% of clients being women. Men often have affairs with colleagues; women reconnect with old friends via social media, he adds.

At a detective agency in Indiranagar, over 50% of total cases are to do with marital infidelity. "This number has tripled in the last five years," says a representative.

Legal angle

Advocate Kusum Ranganathan says adultery-related divorces have risen 25-30 per cent in five years. “It’s not just men; women also have extramarital relationships,” she notes. Some clients hire detectives or hackers to access social media or chat logs. “Technology has made both cheating and exposing it easier,” she adds. Love and arranged marriages are equally prone to infidelity, with 80% settling divorces privately via mutual consent.

Advocate Ian Lewis says infidelity allegations have risen 2-3 fold but are hard to prove. Most complaints come from women in their late 30s about men in their early 40s. He attributes the rise in infidelity to “opportunity and accessibility,” including travel, discreet hotel apps, and online platforms.

Advocate Bojamma P K says divorce due to adultery is seen across all ages but is most common among working couples with limited time together. She adds that adultery can be used as a ground for divorce under Section 13(1)(i) of the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955; Section 27(1)(a) of the Special Marriage Act, 1954; Section 22 and Section 11 of the Indian Divorce Act, 1869 (Christian); Section 32(d) of the Parsi Marriage and Divorce Act, 1936; and Section 45 and 46 of the Army Act, 1950.