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Of pen pals and friendship

Last Updated 08 January 2021, 20:02 IST

People like me who are right in their middle age must have benefitted from conversations with friends during the lockdown and unlock period. This helped a majority pass time, resulting in unlimited conversation. It signified the quantum of bondage. Contacting those who do not feature frequently in our memories. These conversations caused a paradigm shift in, at least in my believe during the lockdown.

Lockdown influenced many to look for the basic roots behind incidents and which influenced in developing friendships. Many must have travelled down memory lane to know and understand the value of friendship and friends. During the late 1970s, many souls like me, after scanning the pages of some fortnightlies and monthlies which were popular among young, tried their hands in contacting pen pals. Thus emerged a pen friendship.

You could choose anyone who had similar hobbies or interests like stamp collecting, photography or essay writing. Then buy an inland letter introduce yourself, mention your age, interests and specific hobbies in crisp sentences and post it. In the early 1970s in Mangalore (now Mangaluru), this was a trend.

Among the many friendships that we developed, one also comes to be acquainted with neighbours in schools and colleges. Friendships that emerge in schools and colleges remain intact for years.

During the lockdown, phone calls and e-mails to and from friends must have eased the monotony, stress and trauma that one experiences significantly. Friends who spoke from the other side, would utter "Hege Iddira? (How are you?)" They continued to speak about friendship. Their voices were pleasant, friendly and more importantly, the conversation was natural.

A large number of people must have undergone such emotional experiences during the lockdown. Friends who were once held close to the heart. Speaking to them was something like travelling in a time capsule, where sharing and caring was the base of friendship. Friendships grow immensely in reciprocal situations when listening becomes more important than speaking.

A good listener is a great friend and friendships that have evolved thus remain intact. If you care for your friends, they will share parts of themselves with you. The lockdown must have increased the gamut of friendship. During the lockdown, every phone call ended with those two soothing words “take care”, which is the basis of all friendships.

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(Published 08 January 2021, 17:32 IST)

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