Anything but a hero

Hero
Hindi (U/A)
Cast: Sooraj Pancholi, Athiya Shetty
Director: Nikhil Advani
Rating: *

This hero is honest enough to admit that he knows only two things — dadagiri and body-building. That accounts for the dozens of baddies beaten to a pulp or flown to outer space.

Coming to body, the entire movie is a tribute to Sooraj Pancholi’s anatomy. The camera romances every ripple in his musculature. The rest of the ogling is left to Athiya Shetty, who almost faints as Pancholi drops his shirt and bulks up. And yes, Pancholi is more than happy to parade his packs than acting chops.

Honestly, the star kids deserved a better launch vehicle than this unflattering remake of Subhash Ghai’s 1983 hit. Both put their earnest foot forward, but stumble on a script that only requires them to go lovey-dovey with the IQ of primary school students.

Shetty girl plays an IG’s daughter, but can’t tell her kidnappers from cops. Also, she’s got the hots for her abductor (Pancholi) who has confined her to a wooden hut among monks. She doesn’t panic, but promises “Buddhaji” that she will give up non-veg food, drinks and “bad words” for her goonda boyfriend.

Let’s say she is not good at keeping her word. Result: Disaster strikes again, or that’s what she thinks. More baddies arrive in hordes, taking the viewer through the same Saviour-Pancholi routine.

Athiya Shetty shows occasional sparks, with an athletic frame which is not so common for Bollywood. Sooraj Pancholi tries hard, but lacks the charisma as “the” hero.

The real one, however, shows up as the end credits roll. As he croons “Main Hoon Hero Tera”, Salman Khan shows the viewers what they have been missing all through.