Partnering interests

One of the best ways to strengthen love is through friendship and one of the best ways to build friendship is through good old-fashioned play, say relationship experts.

Couples, who take time to bond through shared recreational activities and are still ‘best friends’ say, “No, you don't have to completely fall in love with what the other does, but finding an appreciation for it certainly helps build intimacy and better communication, even encouraging spouses to learn more about one another,” they say.

Jude and Monica Koshy believe that there is nothing quite like a sport of angling to spend some quality time together.

 “We often take fishing trips together and the utter peace and quiet, totally de-stresses us,” they say.

“It all started with a trip to Jungle Lodges when I was first introduced to the
pleasures of  ‘Game Fishing’,” explains Monica who  managed to snag a 25-pound
‘Mahaseer’ on her first outing and was hooked for life on the sport ever since.

“Game fishing involves catching the fish purely for sport and then gently releasing it back into the water. The beauty of the scenery combined with the gentle interaction with the fish is a real bonding exercise for any couple or family,” she says.

Cooking came naturally to Vinay who spent time as a young boy watching the family cook on his grandfather’s coffee estate or helping his mum at home.
 He is a radiologist married to Mona, Assistant Manager at BIAL.

 After a hectic day at work, they both head home to rustle up dinner together. Vinay, a big foodie keeps a well-stocked kitchen, loves watching cooking shows on TV or You-tube and experiments with cuisines from different parts of the globe.

“Mona initially wasn’t into cooking but now she enjoys it too. As we both head towards home, we decide on the menu for dinner and whoever reaches first starts the prep work. It could be Italian pasta or pizza (the base made from scratch), a complete ‘chaat’ meal, traditional Mangalorean food, Thai, European or North-Eastern depending on our mood and the ingredients in the fridge,” says Vinay.

Oscar and Doreen Menezes have been dancing  to  their own tune for the last 48 years. “She taught me the moves many years ago and I really don’t enjoy dancing with anyone else. To us, dancing is a craft, a simple delight in well-schooled movement, a place of rhythmic, formalised social exchange with its own rules of etiquette. Today, one doesn’t even have to connect with your partner on the dance floor but for Doreen and myself dance is exciting, athletic and beautiful. There is a high comfort level in sharing something you truly enjoy with your spouse,” says Oscar.

Jagdish and Madhuri, now married for 15 years, pursue different careers. She is a career counsellor and he runs an event management company. “Madhuri joined our jazz band as a vocalist 15 years ago and since then we have been together sharing not just music but love for travel, films, trekking and reading. It’s the number of shared interests that really keeps the spark in our marriage alive,” says Jagdish.

The couple also play many of their original compositions at international jazz festivals. At one such festival recently, they met their icon, Grammy Award winner Peabo Bryson,  whose song Tonight I celebrate my love they used to sing when they first fell in love. “Madhuri writes the lyrics and I compose the music, a highly rewarding joint effort and something we share deeply,” he adds.