Half the Sky: Women enabling women

America’s former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright famously said “There is a special place in hell for women who don’t help each other”. On International Woman’s Day, Sonali Shetty examines the role of mentorship in helping women succeed.

In an informal but engaging conversation she speaks with two women leaders about the importance of mentorship in career and life success.

Menaka Pai is the Director of Industrial Rubber Products Group and is based in Bengaluru. Puneet Jeyasingh is Partner Technology Strategist at Microsoft and is based in Virginia.

In addition to challenging jobs, both women are mothers to young children, giving them additional perspective on the unique challenges of women in the workplace.

What is the best advice that your mentor gave you?

Menaka Pai: In my career spanning 20 years I have had many opportunities to be a mentee and a mentor in a corporate as well as entrepreneurial set up. The best advice I received from my mentor was to “Think BIG and be BOLD”.

Indian women hesitate to express their ideas and opinions fearing how they will be perceived. Women should think positively and work towards their dream goals. My father has been my mentor in my entrepreneurial journey. His advice has been to ‘self -analyse my actions’. Taking a step back and analyzing where things went wrong gives us an opportunity to take corrective action or learn from our mistakes. His other advice is ‘communicate, communicate, communicate’. Strong and clear communication is important.

Puneet Jeyasingh: I agree with Menaka that clear communication solves a lot of problems. My mentors taught me the importance of being able to get work done by influencing people. This is particularly necessary in a matrixed organisation, where one may not have direct authority over team members. Being able to influence positive behavior is a key skill. I also believe in “radical candor”. Sometimes, in the name of politeness, we suppress our true opinion. This is to the detriment of the whole organisation. By being clear and honest, we are able to bring all the issues to the forefront. However, one must balance candor with kindness.

What characteristics do you look for in the young people you choose to mentor?

Menaka Pai: Winston Churchhill said “We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.” I do not choose my mentees. I mentor anyone who asks. I believe the mentee has chosen me since I possess some experience/skills that would be beneficial for them. During the course of the mentoring if there is anything lacking I reach out to people in my mentor network and draw upon their skills.

PJ: I do believe that mentorship must be mutually beneficial. I am very careful to be able to offer some value to my mentors — it could be an opinion, or some data in areas that they are interested in. Furthermore, I am very mindful of their time. I prepare in advance and follow up on specific action items or advice. When I am the mentor, I offer the same advice to my mentees.

In your opinion, how can we involve male allies to invest in women’s success?

MP: I manage a manufacturing company in a very male-dominated industry. Having a senior male mentor gave me access to a large professional network. My mentor introduced me to others in the profession which made a big difference in getting people to recognise my capabilities and accept me as a peer. The first step towards gender equity is acceptance of women in leadership positions and supporting them to reach this position.

PJ: Many leading organizations have recognized the importance of male allies. Several have formal and informal efforts to sensitise men to the value (both in terms of economics and culture) in helping people bring their whole selves to the workplace.

Menaka, you also have a lot of blue collar women in your organisation. What are their special needs and how do you address them?

MP: About half my organization are blue collar women. They come from the lower stratum of society. In many cases they are uneducated and from small villages with no skills. Few are the first women in their homes to step out and work defying male dominance. All these factors had to be considered while setting up a mentoring program. I focus mainly on the three E’s. ‘Empowering’ them with the right skills, ‘Educating’ them of their rights and ‘Encouraging’ them to try new things. I also assign senior women mentors to guide them through this process. It has worked well so far.

It is my observation that sometimes women will not voice an opinion or negotiate for fear of being labeled as aggressive. How do you foster psychological safety in your organisations to give everyone a voice?

MP: I like to lead by example. I make it a point to be approachable and supportive and encourage others through my words and actions. Senior male managers are sensitised on the importance of fostering an inclusive environment.

PJ: A lot has been written about the need for women to “lean in” in the workplace. The most amazing thing about working for one of the world’s leading technology companies, is that the best ideas win and it doesn’t matter who originates the ideas. That attitude is set at the leadership level.Forward looking companies recognize the need to create a culture where all can speak up. Psychological safety is a key element of company culture.

As mothers of young children, both of you are juggling multiple responsibilities. What is one tip that you can give our readers on work-life balance?

MP: You cannot do everything. Accept it! Time management is the key. I follow the 3 D’s of time management by making a list of tasks. Then I categorise them into “Do, Defer, or Delegate” This helps me manage my day well, including spending time with my family. Never hesitate to ask for help.

PJ: Enlist your partner’s help in managing the myriad tasks that we all face. Finally, let go of the superwoman complex. Balance is a myth — we sometimes have to over-stress one aspect of our lives over the other. As long as we are careful to periodically re-balance, everything turns out fine in the long run.

(The author is a tech entrepreneur and a strong advocate for Women in Technology)