I own all my films, completely and totally: Kajol on hits and flops

New Delhi: Her cinematic journey is not just defined by blockbusters. Kajol says she owns each of her films "completely and totally", be it mega hits like "Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge" and "Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham" or a "Gundaraj" and "Hulchul" that fell by the wayside and are long forgotten.

"I would not change one iota of it," the actor, who made her debut with "Bekhudi" in 1992, told PTI in an interview. She is also proud of the ones that did not work commercially.

"I think all the films I've done so far have played a huge part in my career. For me personally, I would say I own them. I own them completely and totally, I take full responsibility for each and every one of them. Credit or discredit, belongs to me," Kajol told PTI in an interview.

With the highs come the lows. In 1995, for instance, she delivered two of the year’s biggest hits "Karan Arjun" and "Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge", and also appeared in "Taaqat", "Hulchul" and "Gundaraj".

"If they've not done well, they may not have done well on a ticket basis. But yes, I did learn something from it. I have done my best in every way. I don't think I have been dishonest in front of the camera. I can say that with actual pride," she added.

As someone who spent her life in front of the camera, she has nothing but gratitude for her career of three decades, said the actor, who will next be seen in the second season of the JioHotstar series "The Trial".

"I'm grateful that I can call myself relevant in this day and age. I've been lucky. Yes, I am talented, but there are a lot of talented people who have not been probably as lucky as me.

"One thing that comes back to me every time is that I have literally lived my life in front of the cameras. I've fallen down, I've gotten up, I've gotten pregnant, I've had babies, I've got married, I've been a teenager, I've been a 25-year-old... I've done everything in front of the camera. And yet I feel that people look at me with so much love and they forgive me, all my little idiosyncrasies." Kajol cemented her place as one of the most loved stars of the 1990s with a filmography that included "Baazigar", "Udhaar Ki Zindagi", "Gupt" and "Kuch Kuch Hota Hai".

The following decade came "Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham", "Fanaa" and "My Name Is Khan".

More recently, she has ventured into the OTT space with "The Trial" being her debut series.

Asked if there was a particular decade she found most creatively fulfilling, Kajol said she doesn’t view her career in terms of eras but through individual performances.

"Fortunately for me, I've had performances that I've loved... Initially maybe I had 'Udhaar Ki Zindagi' and 'Dushman'. After that, I had 'Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham' and after five years, I had another film... I've been blessed that I've had really good work throughout. I wouldn't say that there has been a particular decade." "The Trial" is an adaptation of popular American show "The Good Wife" and features her as a housewife who, after 10 years, starts working at a law firm to support her family when her husband is arrested in a sex and corruption scandal.

In her career, Kajol has never revisited a character again but reprising the role of Noyonika for the show's second chapter was a refreshing experience.

"It's actually quite interesting to play the same character again because when you do a film, the character has one arc and that's it's over when the movie ends. You never revisit that character again. You never go back to that character. But when you're doing a series which has a second season, you are growing that character. So it's a very interesting experience." In the new season, which premieres on JioHotstar on September 19, Noyonika has now found her footing in the ruthless world of law and battles new challenges, impossible choices and shocking betrayals.

For Kajol, returning to the show felt like "reading the second chapter of a book" that she picked up earlier.

"There aren't that many changes in the approach. But obviously, I am a different person today to what I was two years back. I have changed and it's normal that the character you're seeing on screen, will also be different in season two.

"She was shown a little unsure in season one as she didn't know where she's going in life, where she's going in her career. But in season two, she has a little more confidence in herself. She knows where her career is going. She knows that her kids are fine. And she has taken a very strong step forward towards a particular life."