Thumbs down to handshakes

When I ran into my old friend Monty on my evening stroll, we were pleasantly surprised seeing each other after more than a decade. We shrieked in delight, grasped our hands and engaged in small talk for nearly thirty seconds like the way President Trump and President Macron did three years ago when they met.

All of a sudden, Monty yanked his hand away and that’s when we realised all norms of social distancing were thrown to the wind. We guffawed at our gaffe and took comfort in the fact that we didn’t exchange a hug and we had our masks on. After a merry, long chat, we parted ways with a goodbye wave.

It is several months now since the coronavirus fear gripped humankind, bringing in its wake social distancing and banishing common forms of greeting. I remember in the early days when anxiety and uncertainty over the coronavirus loomed large. I had gone for a meeting and when summoned into the executive’s cabin, I courteously shot a hand out. The executive didn’t reciprocate, rather placed his palms together, fingers pointing upwards and said “Namaste”.

“Oh yes, social distancing, I forgot,” I muttered sheepishly before we got down to business. What a clean, hygienic way of greeting I thought to myself after the meeting ended and wondered whether this typical Indian form of greeting is here to stay.

But even before Covid-19, my offer of a handshake was rejected. An intern joined our newspaper when I was working in the UAE some years ago. When the bureau chief introduced the intern, I said hello, offering my hand as an overture. The Emirati lady not only rejected my polite offer but retreated coyly, placing her right hand over her heart. The bureau chief saved the day by deftly skipping to some pleasantries.

With no signs of the coronavirus coming under control, it seems the age-old gesture of handshakes is on its last legs, if I may say so. So would it be an elbow touch, fist bump, a tap on the back, a simple wave or a bow of the head as the Japanese do? Or would it be the ‘Wuhan Shake’ which, like the virus, has already gone viral online?

Personally, I would think, instead of any form of touch or opening one’s mouth, a friendly smile could be the best form of greeting. After all, haven’t we heard the old saying: "A smile is a curve that sets everything straight." If one may add, it could even set any virus straight!