Judge not others

 
It is when I start believing that this is how everybody should live; if not everybody, at least the people who I interact with.

On the one hand, I have my value system, my prejudices; on the other, I have the actions of people. I compare, helplessly. This comparison is judgment. What we don’t understand is that everyone acts according to their own inherent nature; who are we to interfere there?

The scriptures recommend that everyone should have certain values, only because the mind is indisciplined by nature. Therefore we need external policing, an external code of conduct. Values bring in a kind of discipline in us. But we get attached to our values. Defects are visible only to those eyes that are jaundiced with attachment. We must learn to have our value systems on one side, but try to understand the Truth, all the same. Go beyond the value systems and open up the intellect through a systematic study and reflection on the scriptures.

People say – positive criticism. Criticism is an analysis done with wrong intention. Having the right intention is considered to be positive. But what is the right intention? Isn’t it correcting others, as per ‘Me’? Even if there is 100% objectivity and genuineness in you, criticism is not going to solve any problem. Because growth happens only in the atmosphere of love. Love means recognising the freedom of others to think and act in their ways. Growth and maturity is in the non-judging spirit. Understand that those whom we call ‘fallen’ have just not ‘risen’ yet.

You ought not to criticise; not because it hurts others, but because the venom comes back and strikes you harder. Anything not accepted will come back to the owner. And no one accepts criticism. Buddha went to a village; people greeted him with sweets and took the same as his prasad. He went to another village; there people hurled abuses at him. Buddha said “As those who offered sweets took the very same sweets back as prasad; these people will also take back with them what they offered to me”.

Criticism starts with the fundamental mistake of considering myself as the little self, automatically I will see and relate to others as individuals. There is bound to be judgment and criticism, leading to disharmony. The moment I understand the Godhood in me – I become open. I will be able to accept and digest everything. Then it is like asking, “Who will cast the first stone?”