Nothing short of bizarre

Aiyyaa
Hindi, Tamil, Marathi
(U/A)

Director: Sachin Kundalkar

Cast: Rani Mukherji, Prithiviraj, Subodh Bhave, Jyoti Subhash, Anita Date

Isn’t there a CBFC rating called ‘Rejected’? That is the certification that Aiyyaa should have received, and never mind that Anurag Kashyap is one of its producers, and definitely never mind that Rani Mukherji is its heroine.

Poor Rani though. It is such a pity that she had to resort to an Aiyyaa to resurrect her career. Notwithstanding her 2009 outing with Dil Bole Hadippa, she did do a commendable job with No One Killed Jessica. But Aiyyaa actually should be renamed ‘Aiee Yayee Yo’.

In all fairness though, can an actor be blamed entirely for such a disastrous film?

Christ, what were the cast and crew on the film thinking? Starting from Kashyap, who literally threw his crores away, to writer-director Sachin Kundalkar whose talent is in very serious doubt, down to the lyricist Amitabh Bhattacharya whose lyrics, especially ‘Dreamum Wakeuppam’ and ‘To Do’ should never have made it past the censor board.

The film even officially referred to as ‘quirky’ and ’whacky’ love story is nothing short of bizarre!

Even an attempt to explain the story would be futile. Suffice it to say the hero (Prithiviraj as Surya – a brooding-type painter who has been given no dialogues in the film until the last two scenes) ignores an over-the-top Rani throughout.

She in turn tolerates the suitor Madhav (Subodh Bhave) found for her by her parents while fantasising about Surya. Adding to the mess are the strangest of beings Meenaxi surrounds herself with, including a brother who collects strays off the streets and nurses a dream of opening a ‘kutta ghar’ sometime; a blind grandmother who races around the house on a battery-operated wheelchair and the most bizarre of them, ‘Lady Gaga bai’-type friend (Anita Date) who can’t talk straight, walk straight and only deteriorates as the film progresses. She is seriously seen to be believed, but don’t bother.

Aiyyaa should have never seen the light of day. Do yourself a favour. Stay away!