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Orderly disorder

Right In The Middle
Last Updated 19 October 2009, 16:42 IST

On the Alzheimer’s Day last month, I read about Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder (AAADD): A ‘senior’ citizen suddenly remembers he has to wash the car; moves to the garage; notices mail on the table; goes through that first; keeps car keys on the desk, to discard junk mail into trash-can; finds it full. So, keeps bills on the desk; takes trash-can out … to go near the mailbox anyway; so why not pay the bills also?

Where is the cheque-book… only one leaf? Yeah, more in the desk; leaves trash-can in situ; then sees the half-drunk Coke on the desk. Now why not put the Coke away from the computer... wait, why not in fridge? So heads towards kitchen; notices flower-plants need watering. So places Coke on the counter, when he eyes ‘forgotten-where-specs’; puts them away safely.

Lunch-cum-nap intervenes! Net result by evening: car isn’t washed; bills are unpaid; trash stays in; Coke continues on kitchen counter; flowers are half-watered; cheque-book still has only one leaf! But, where are the car keys? While that is figured out, thinks back how come at day’s end, nothing got done? Senior is baffled because he had been busy all day! Realises it’s a serious condition; must get help. That will be tomorrow; so why not check e-mail?

Cut to real life. Bala and wife, at Golconda go to Abid’s by scooter. First halt: for a pant-piece. After many inspections pieces get piled high, with helmet hidden underneath! Take the parcel; but forget the helmet. Next halt: bakery for a cake. Cake has to be held straight; so wife takes it and Bala runs across the busy road to get torch-cells; result: pant-piece-parcel is left in the bakery!

Crossing back, he looks straight at the scooter, kick-starts and leaves. Wife is yelling but traffic noise is high! Stops at secretariat traffic-light; seeing the police, he tells the absent-wife why she didn’t remind him about the helmet. Shock: wife is not there! So, returns to the bakery and gets a mouthful. She asks him about the helmet, hoping he has the cells and the pant-piece. Realisation dawns. Tracing the way back, collects all items including the wife and drives back!
Don’t let this happen to you!

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(Published 19 October 2009, 16:42 IST)

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