Dial Prez for laundry

humour

A telephone subscriber in the United States who dialled his laundry got connected instead to the top-secret telephone of President Barak Obama.

News Report.
“Hello, Snow White Laundromat? Look, this is utterly outrageous and I’m certainly not going to take it lying down. Last week, I sent you three trousers and four shirts to be dry cleaned and pressed and I’ve got them back minus all the buttons and fly zippers. What kind of a laundry service are you running anyway?”

“I’m sorry, sir, but you’ve got the wrong number. This is the emergency hotline scrambler telephone line to the President and used to alert him to an imminent Russian nuclear missile attack and the total annihilation of the United States and the free world, I request you most urgently to hang up and try dialling the correct number of Snow White Laundromat.”

“Okay, this is the emergency hotline scrambler telephone line to the President and I’m former President Bill Clinton coming clean over the Monica Lewinsky affair. Yesterday I sent you my Levi’s to be stonewashed and darned and I’ve got them back minus the ‘I love America’ patch on the bum. I tell you. I’ve never seen a lousier laundry service in my life.”

“I repeat most urgently. Sir, this is the emergency hotline scrambler telephone line to the President and blocking it caused a grave national security alert and US military forces worldwide being placed on the highest state of readiness to launch an all-out thermo-nuclear war. I request you to hang up immediately.”

“Look , you can’t brazenly rip off my buttons and fly zippers and bum patches and then try to fob me off with this hotline scrambler telephone line malarkey. Last month, I sent you my white dressing gown to be dyed saffron and steam pressed.

I was thinking of giving up the senior vice-presidency of Microsoft Corporation, embrace Hinduism and hit the road with the Hare Krishna guys as a monk. You still haven’t delivered my saffron gown and my ardour for exotic oriental religions and nirvana has cooled off. I warn you, I’ve got a good mind to take my clothes elsewhere.”

“I repeat, sir, this is the hotline scrambler telephone line to the President and why, even now, nuclear tipped ss-33 intercontinental ballistic missiles might be on their way and with you blocking the hotline, they might well zap us.”

“No, they won’t, not a country with a laundry service that can’t wash its customers’ clothes. Well, listen, I’ve got another grouse. You advertise in TV commercials — ‘We wash your things in high-speed, automatic, computer-controlled machines.’

Well, last week, as I was driving along Lake Chicago, I swear I saw your workmen beating clothes on a rock and washing and rinsing them in a stagnant cesspool by the lake. I ask you, isn’t your advertisement dishonest and misleading? Another thing, your starching…..”

“I repeat, sir, this is the emergency hotline scrambler telephone line to the Oval Office and to convince you — though this might cost me my job, I’ll put the President himself on the line.”

“Hello, this is the President. Don’t tell me that the Russians are going to drop in on us?”
“Mmmm… you do sound like ol’ man Barak. For heaven’s sake, what are you doing working in the lousy Snow White Laundromat?”