Angels and demons

As the bike rider neared the woman on the scooty, he began gesticulating at her.

Women, like me, are a nervous lot these days. The Nirbhaya tragedy in December 2012 blew the lid off the atrocities that are perpetrated against women. The almost continuous reports of children as young as three years and as old as eighty-three being raped, has awakened us to the fact that age is not a factor. And finding out that rapists lurk on the streets, in schools, and even in one’s own home, has sent a clear message that we are not safe anywhere.

In these Dark Ages, there is an atmosphere of fear and suspicion in the hearts of women. We are alert to the slightest deviation from the normal when we step outside our homes. We constantly scrutinise the words and body language of the men we meet, aware that, if we aren’t careful, we might get hurt. And we don’t trust anyone.

It was with this disquieting mindset that I witnessed a strange incident. My family and I were travelling by car to an event. Ahead of us on the road, was a woman riding a scooty. In the oncoming traffic, was a man riding a motorbike. As he approached from the opposite side, he began gesticulating at the woman, much to my horror and disgust. It was obvious to me that the woman had noticed, since he passed quite close to her. There was no way she could have missed his actions.
The woman did what every woman does under those circumstances – she ignored him. Her back straight, she looked away from him and kept going, without acknowledging him. A couple of seconds later, she turned a corner.

This whole incident upset me terribly. The man had made gestures at her in broad daylight,  on a public road, and got away with it! This was the plight of women in India. This was the fate of a daughter, a sister, a wife and mother. I was processing these unhappy thoughts as our car turned the same corner, and I saw something happening on the side of the road. The woman on the scooty had been stopped by a policeman who was writing something on a receipt book. I got the merest glimpse of the woman opening her purse as we moved on.

As we continued on our way, I began to get the true picture. It was very simple. The policeman had positioned himself by the road on the corner to catch helmet-less riders of two-wheelers. The man who had gestured to the woman, had seen the policeman as he came around the corner, and tried to warn the woman. This is illegal, but he was, in fact, trying to help her. But the woman-rider, who had no idea about the policeman waiting to trap her, had readily believed that the man was misbehaving towards her… just as I had.

The lesson this incident taught me is obvious. Firstly, don’t be too quick to judge. Next, you’re not always right. The main takeaway, however, is: All men are NOT beasts, and all women – sorry, sisters – are not angels. Understanding this, we women should take the time and opportunity to celebrate good and decent men around us. By showing our appreciation openly, we reinforce good behaviour, and let them know that we are aware of their worth.

I wonder what the scooty-rider’s impression of the gesticulating man was, as she rode away after paying the fine. As for me, my day got brighter.