My friend Jhandu

He is not a colleague. He is neither the local champ nor a coach. He is only a caddie.

Even the discouraging nip in the early morning air cannot cure me of the temptation of rushing to the Golf course every day.

My handicap of 24 hardly justifies such exuberant enthusiasm. Sipping her piping hot coffee, my wife wistfully looks on,wondering if I have a girlfriend waiting out there at the greens.

How can I convince her that it is the joy of spending some quality time with my friend, Jhandu, that eggs me on. No, Jhandu is not a colleague. He is neither the local champ nor a coach. He is only a caddie at the local golf course. The club has graded all caddies as Class A or B and fixed their fees accordingly. But Jhandu is a class apart!

He is a caddie with an attitude, in spite of his often unshaven cheeks and none too smart appearance. Like all other caddies, he too gets his regulation T-shirts with NGC embroidered smartly on the pocket. But he hardly ever wears them. Other caddies say that he gives them all away scornfully to his kin who have usurped the tidy compensation he received from the government for his acquired agricultural land.

But Jhandu philosophically maintains that he is happy with what he earns with his caddying skill. Of course, you are welcome to tip him if you are too concerned! And the uniform? Well, that is for spoilt brats who only want to look like film stars but know nothing about caddying!

He can barely hide that slight bias for generous tippers but they are the gainers, as Jhandu’s golfing tips are more precious than their cash tips. Unlike other caddies, he is never seen chasing the generous foreigners who throng the course on weekends.

However, he barely conceals his chagrin for the miserly members sticking to the laid down caddie fees. Once, I denied him this extra for a cuppa tea as I didn’t have small change . I reminded him that one of our foursome had already signed for tea for all four caddies at the midway kiosk. “You didn’t sign, why should that concern you?” asked Jhandu scornfully.

You cannot argue with Jhandu. If he suggests a wedge to retrieve a ball ensconced in thick grass, you can ignore him and chose a hybrid retriever at your own peril. He would tick you off by keeping a glum face even if you score a birdie or drop a 20 feet putt. If he is happy with your general conduct you would get a warm “shabash”for a good shot.

Once I suggested that it wasn’t a very polite way of encouraging his seniors. He was quick to retort that in his village even national level pahalwans are encouraged by a full-throated shabash in wrestling matches.

He doesn’t show much deference to age as he measures everyone by the golf course seniority. Once, I enquired about his age and he retorted that remembering dates of birth was the meaningless hobby of “big people”; he was senior to every member of the course as he started caddying here the day the course was thrown open.