JOIN USThe wrong doers are everywhere. I’m not talking about the sadistic ones who go killing people and kidnapping children. I’m talking about the less brutal ones, who do not follow a file while seeking service at counters; who disregard traffic signals; who flout laws; who give or take bribes; who litter in public; who are, in short, casual wrongdoers in their daily walks of life. And the biggest irony is that we are all part of this group, to a greater or lesser degree.
So, is it fair for any of us to criticize the wrongdoers? I’m not suggesting we support them. But I’m suggesting that we take to them kindly and if possible to set a good example, without condemning them. As Sharon Lebell in her book, ‘The art of living,’ aptly put it, “The appropriate response to bad deeds is pity for the perpetrators, since they have adopted unsound beliefs and are deprived of the most valuable human capacity: the ability to differentiate between what is truly good and bad for them. Their original moral intuitions have been distorted so they have no chance at inner serenity. Whenever someone does something foolish, pity him rather than yield to hatred and anger as so many do.”
Each one us is the product of our environment, upbringing, culture and education. The constant pull and push of society drives us in all directions, both positive and negative. It is believed that an individual is the average of the five people he spends the most time with. Under such conditions, the human mind is programmed to move with the flow and to often commit errors and make wrong judgements. Together with the mob-mentality, we are all flawed to some extent.
So, when we see wrongdoers, instead of criticizing them, let us take a softer attitude and gently seek to amend their ways. If we can understand that what exists in others is present in us too, it becomes easy to take kindly towards wrongdoers. Margaret Halsey said it well: “Whenever I dwell for any length of time on my own shortcomings, they gradually begin to seem mild, harmless, rather engaging little things, not at all like the staring defects in other people's characters.”