Be like a proton. Always positive

Sexi Saheli is a weekly column of answers to questions you never dared to ask. If something is troubling you and there’s not a soul you can speak to, write to Sexi Saheli at sexisaheli@ deccanherald.co.in.

Dear Saheli,
I am in PUC 1st year. I have trouble choosing between becoming a nuclear chemist or a doctor. I have an interest in both jobs since I like science a lot. My mom doesn’t exactly know what a nuclear chemist does or what it is, so she says it’s my wish. Help me choose.
Deepa

Dear Deepa,
Unclear about nuclear? Keep your ion on LinkedIn. Find a nuclear chemist on it, connect with him/her and ask them questions about their job. Doctors are easier. Find one and ask if you can follow them on their rounds (preferably, post-Covid vaccine please). Go fission for answers from the experts. Once you get them, you’ll have a blast figuring out your future. Top science tip for life: Be like a proton. Always positive. Good luck!

Hi Sexi Saheli,
I’m in a relationship for 4 years. I can proudly say that he is the one for me but he is of a different caste. In my home, they will never agree to our marriage because of this. We are also of the same age — 23 (he needs time to settle). I don’t know how to convince my parents. His parents know and they have no issues. Why are Indian parents so particular about caste? Why can’t they agree if he is good and capable instead of worrying about status and society? Please suggest how to convince them.
Miss Do Not Mention My Name

Miss Do Not Mention My Name,
There’s no hard and caste rule about who you should marry. Though he is for you, he is clearly not for your parents. Buy time. Get a job. Both of you need to ‘settle’. Once you are financially strong, speak to your parents. Maybe that will help them believe their little daughter is now old enough and smart enough to choose her life partner. Caste no bar.

Dear Saheli,
I got rejected by my childhood friend and lost his friendship. Now, I am too scared to confess my feelings to other guys. I got numerous proposals, I rejected them all but haven’t lost their friendship. I was okay with the rejection, but why does my childhood friend hate me? He has a GF now and I am fine with that too. I told him so but he isn’t listening to me. He just avoids me and won’t even accept my follow request.
Shobita

Dear Shobita,
Loving someone who doesn’t love you is like waiting for a ship at an airport. Or as Oprah said, don’t want anyone who doesn’t want you. We are a nation of 1.3 billion people. Why follow him when he doesn’t follow you? Four words for you — Move On / Ignore Him. Once you do that, your fear will sink and your love life will soar.