Satire: The Great Garbage and Pothole Summit, 2025

In a shining city once also known as the Silicon Valley of East, now endearingly identified as the Pothole Capital of Progress, an unusual war broke out between the mighty ones. Not over ideology, not over economy, not over business policies but over ... POTHOLES AND GARBAGE.

It all started when an important industrialist, let’s call her Madam Molecule, took to the land of biggest digital gossip platform (which till a few years ago had a blue bird logo) to announce that her international guests had confused the city’s craters for cutting-edge rainwater harvesting infrastructure. Madam lamented that her billion-dollar biotech guests had to navigate a sophisticated modern-day obstacle course to access her glass tower office, a true corporate workout!

The ruling powers, led by the ever-smiling Minister of Miracles, didn’t take too kindly to this public angst at their failing civic duty. "What a way to ruin the prestige of our wonderful metropolitan," the Minister exclaimed, while standing ankle deep in a newly pothole'd road (we all know what that means!). "We are actively endeavoring to promote garbage redistributing across all neighborhoods (potholes across all sidewalks), not only the wealthy areas."

Soon, soldiers and loyalists joined the battle and to prove their loyalty to the Minister, they even started saying Madam Molecule had forgotten her roots.

Almost for a week, the online battle continued. One side yelled, “Fix the roads!” The other side yelled back, “Fix your attitude!” Digital warriors posted images of trash mountains, captioning them Innovation Hub 2.0. Over enthusiastic anonymous users started suggesting solutions: build drones to carry commuters over potholes, or convert trash to political manifestos (since they are equally recyclable).

Then suddenly peace broke out and a ceasefire was announced just as the citizens stocked popcorn for another week of civic chaos. Madam Molecule and the Minister of Miracles met for tea. Images, smiles, handshakes, and Deepawali wishes shared in-person. With the caption, “Healthy discussions on growth and innovation.”

Growth - assumedly in potholes. Innovation - in trash distribution.

Meanwhile, the internet sighed relief, the Great Garbage and Pothole War was over, the roads, however, appeared unchanged, standing proud landmarks of durability and nocivity.

Still, the city hummed along, citizens moving effortlessly between traffic jams, street dogs, and broken pavements serving as living testament that while governance is wobbly, optimism never is.

And somewhere in the distance, Madam Molecule and the Minister of Miracles raised a toast to “Bengaluru’s growth story,” not to spill the tea, lest it make yet another pothole.