Happy wrinkles

Humour

Happy wrinkles

Of course, the bad news is that it won’t be long before your teeth are floating in it.” I have reached middle age and it has hit me like a ton of bricks. My daughter got married three years ago and my son recently got a job and moved to another town.  How old am I? Ask me no questions, and I will tell you no lies.There was a time when I would look back and see guys wipe the drool off their chins. Now, any man with functioning retinas would say that I’m passable; that is, I can pass through the front door. When I found my first strand of grey hair among the black, I was appalled and pulled it out. Needlessly to say, a 100 more popped out. Is it right to say that I was literally tearing out my hair in agony?

When I watch Catherine Zeta Jones on television, I find her ‘revoltingly’ beautiful. I’m also good looking, except in my case it is “good from far and far from good.” In appearance, I’m nothing that would set a bonfire alight. Oh yes, I still have a smile that would make a guy go weak in his knees, but that will change soon. Remember, “My glass is half full”. Yes, I am laughing at myself because I keep telling myself, that all this is going to get worse. I know that my face will soon be a landscape of wrinkles but that’s okay with me. I’m not going to be splitting hair anymore. The only exercise that I get these days is “pushing” my luck and “throwing” my weight around. I have been accumulating fat that would make a hippopotamus anxious but “to exercise is human, not to, is divine”. Or could it be that my clothes are shrinking?

I notice my facial features beginning their inevitable surrender to the advances of time. I decided to face reality in an optimistic way and be myself! It doesn’t matter whether I am thin or fat, young or old; it’s all about attitude. I don’t want to go under the doctor’s scalpel nor get myself some Botox shots; attitude is all I want. I thank God that wrinkles don’t hurt and I cannot see a lot of grey tresses because the number of my spectacles is slowly increasing. Isn’t that a great balance of the pros and cons? I’m throwing caution to the wind and renewing diplomatic relations with potatoes and pastries. As Drew Barrymore says “I would rather be a few kilograms heavier than be worried all the time”.

Middle age doesn’t mean it is the end of the road. I am only half way through. When I retire, I’m going to learn to play a musical instrument, catch up on my reading and traveling, paint a few pictures and watch my toe nails grow that is; apart from counting my “laugh lines” and “crows feet”. I love this bumper sticker that says “real women don’t have hot flashes, they have power surges”. I don’t pretend to have the right answers but all I can say is that I have the right attitude. I am looking forward to ageing gracefully. Ageing seems to be the only way to live a long life. Rightfully said by Emerson, “The essence of age is intellect”.

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