A coronavirus anthology

RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE

There are many blood groups-- A positive, B positive to name a few, but only two types of people now-- coronavirus positive or coronavirus negative. Either you are affected, unfortunately, or not, fortunately. Similarly, BC has also acquired new meanings. It no longer denotes only ‘before Christ but has also come to refer to the times before coronavirus. Move on Christ, please. Times are changing.

Until recently weekends were short, restricted to the usual Saturdays and Sundays. For the retired gentry, it was a long weekend of course. Now, it is a long weekend for most, except for the work-from-home brigade. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday have merged with Saturday and Sunday to form an extended weekend for the employed. All dressed up and nowhere to go! That’s why some people dream that after the self-quarantine period finally comes to an end, they will apply for leave and stay in the office! For many government staffers, staying at home is not that much of a different experience because they are used to not working in the office too!

For many stuck at home Newton’s second law of motion has been redefined-- a body at rest will continue to be at rest until the wife notices and finds some work for him.

“Why are you late?" "Traffic, sir" "But this is an online class!" "Yes sir, network traffic.” You cannot beat the computer-savvy students after all. How they wish to uninstall the virus affected 2020 and reinstall it! No chance.

Those who were finding it difficult to spell quarantine are now struggling with hydroxychloroquine. Learning is continuous. Those who used to dress smartly and venture out are seeking suggestions from Facebook on what to wear at home and still look smart. Want to go out? Put on your mask, get set and go – but only if you must. Talk is no longer silver and silence gold. Now the mask is silver and social distance gold.

Many pets are wondering why everyone is staying at home and disturbing them. For such disturbed pets and others, the advice-- if you can stay positive in a negative situation you win.

Unity is strength? Not any longer. We can stand together only by not standing together. United we fall, divided we stand is the norm in these AC days.

See, how busy I am compiling all these coronavirus quotes? If this continues, I will have to compile a second volume.