'Eternal You' and the ethics of using AI to 'talk' to dead loved ones

In the 1960s, science-fiction writer Arthur C. Clarke coined a useful adage: "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." He was right, as demonstrated by the almost mystical reverence with which people tend to describe artificial intelligence tools like ChatGPT. We know it's just software. We even kind of understand how the program works. But because it's so advanced that it feels uncanny -- like it knows me -- we treat it with veneration and a little fear, as if it is a god and not a creation.

And, increasingly, we turn to AI to answer the sorts of questions and fulfill the kinds of longings that religion once solved. That is the topic of the new documentary "Eternal You" (available on demand and directed by Hans Block and Moritz Riesewieck).

As the title suggests, "Eternal You" is mostly concerned with a very particular use of AI: giving users the illusion of talking to their dead loved ones. Large language models trained on the deceased's speech patterns, chat logs and more can be made to imitate that person's way of communicating so well that it feels to the grief-stricken as if they're crossing the border between life and death. Those tools can be comforting, but they're also potentially big business. One of the film's subjects calls it "death capitalism."

I first saw "Eternal You" a year ago during its festival run, and when I rewatched it recently I was startled to realize how much has changed in those 12 short months. We've learned about -- or just wholesale adopted -- AI friends and AI partners. Our social media feeds are now flooded with "people" who are not people at all, and Meta announced plans to create them systematically on their own platforms. The idea that there was a lot of money to be made in letting us chat with an imitation of a dead person felt a little fringe to me a year ago, but I'm pretty sure now that I was wrong.

The subjects of "Eternal You" range from the bereaved to the skeptical to the software creators. Some people like the experience; others find it deeply disturbing. But what's more interesting are the questions animating the documentary: not whether it's ethical to try to talk to the dead, but whether it's ethical for a software firm to sell that "ability." As sociologist Sherry Turkle notes in the film, AI is a "brilliant device that knows how to trick you into thinking there's a there there."

"Eternal You" isn't really about overcoming death, as it turns out. In a wide-ranging and somewhat rambling manner, it is about humans' desperation to find meaning in life wherever they can, and how companies are rushing to fill that gap and inspire almost religious devotion, even in the professionals making the tools. But it also feels like a warning: That's not your loved one on the other end at all -- and it's not magic either.