More B’lureans are turning to arranged marriages since Covid

Most matchmakers say their business is up by 30-40%, one has seen its biggest clientele ever

Matchmaking companies in Bengaluru have seen their customer base rise by 30% to 40% since last year. The demand is coming from people as young as 22 to those touching 40.

After failing to find love organically and on dating sites, many are hiring matchmakers for a one-time registration or recurring monthly fee of Rs 3,000 to Rs 8,000.

Relationship coach and matchmaker Radhika Mohta shares: “In big cities, there is more freedom to choose the life partner. But when people constantly get attracted to ‘wrong people’, those who are emotionally unavailable or aren’t ready to commit, they consider arranged marriage as a backup.”

‘Indian Matchmaking’, a show about arranging marriages that returned with the second season despite being dubbed regressive and misogynistic, has also played a part.

“Lately, I’ve been getting lots of younger clients, who were ashamed or uncomfortable with getting into an arranged marriage but are now ready it give it a try after watching the show,” says Rukhsana K, who runs a private matchmaking service for the Muslim community.

She claims she is fielding 50 enquiries on an average per week against 20-30 before the pandemic.

“The candidates are hunting for matchmakers on their own, not through parents,” Rukhsana adds.

Lonely in lockdowns

The consecutive lockdowns also pushed the matchmaking business. “For many, it was a period of self-reflection. People who would constantly spend time with friends and go on trips felt suddenly lonely. This made them long for a constant companion,” Rukhsana explains.

Radhika has seen the same: “As flatmates moved to their hometown, many felt the heightened need to find a long-term companion, somebody to depend on in times like these,” she says.

Moreover, remote working gave people “more time to prioritise their personal relationships and goals,” she adds. Such as Indiranagar resident Amar (name changed). He signed up on a matrimony website early this year and is set to tie the knot in two months.

“For two years through the pandemic, I was my own companion and felt lonely from time to time. As I work from home now and have time for myself, I decided to focus on building a family,” the 30-year-old says.

People felt they wasted two years waiting for the world to get back to normalcy — go out, meet people, find a life partner. “Now there are many who would like to get married,” Nasreen Yousuf, co-founder of R T Nagar-based Made In Heaven. Her company is receiving 50 to 70 calls every week, from “people of all ages”.

More matches are happening in cities like Bengaluru and Hyderabad as now people are moving in for jobs.

More demands, low matches

The delegation of responsibility is a big reason why millennials are opting for arranged marriages.

“We do a background check on every family and set up a match after the needs of both sides align, ranging from looks to financial stability and family life,” says Nasreen.

The youngsters today are quite vocal about the qualities they want in their life partner. ‘How much money does he/she make?’ is a question many ask, points out Gururaj Narayanswamy, CEO of Ediga Matchmaker in Bagalakunte.

“Apart from belonging to the same caste and community, financial stability is one of the most important aspects they seek,” he adds. His company is dealing with 200 clients per month as compared to 80 to 100 clients last year.

However, the long list of expectations is resulting in low matches. “While proposals have increased, the matches are rare. It’s tough because people have more expectations today, concerning looks to educational qualifications and family values,” says Mohammed Tabrej, founder, Wedguide4u Matrimony Service. Women are approaching them more than men and their clientele is the highest they have ever seen, he claims.

Age shift

Since the pandemic broke out, younger men in the city are seeking marriage. “Earlier, men would start thinking of marriage after 28. Now, we are getting enquiries by men between 24 and 26 years of age,” says matchmaker Nasreen Yousuf.

Ravi Kumar, director, Anuraga Matrimony, has observed the same but he also says, “Women are starting to look for matches late, at 23 or 24. Earlier, we would get enquiries from 20 or 21-year-olds.”