That feeling... to go back home

Long distance

While growing up, the most frequent thoughts occupying your waking moments would have been questions of where you see yourself in the next 10 years, your ambitions and your desires. While many picture a handsome job and stability, what accompanies it for most, are decisions to move out of their comfort zone, their home and their families.

Metrolife spoke to a cross-section of young professionals and what prompted them to take a decision to step out.

Abhinav Choudhary, 25, who hails from Bhopal moved out eight years ago to Kota and Jaipur before being placed at Gurgaon. He says that besides better career prospects, he wanted to meet new people. Presently a marketing strategy analyst at Sapient Nitro, he tells Metrolife, “I wanted to stay away from home because I wanted to explore other
unfamiliar places and people and get a chance to learn from all those experiences which is not possible being at home.” He adds, “I wanted to step out of the home’s comfort zone in order to reach few extra miles.”

For Pratik Anand, 22, from Bhagalpur and currently with a field sales job in Thane which allows him to travel. It was a ‘conscious decision’. He says, “I have always been habituated to movement and though, I am a loner now, but I don’t mind moving around because I can’t see the same place and same people everyday.”

While for many ambition, aspirations and needs drive them beyond attachments, for some, the idea is to understand their own selves without a cushion. Aishwarya TG pursuing MTech Biotech, Gautam Buddha University, says, “I have become a bit more independent while taking care of myself.” While for Aishwarya, loneliness has stopped troubling her because of the company of her friends, there are still others who would like to return home at the first instance possible.

Shivangi Pathak, systems engineer at Infosys, Pune shares, “There was a time when I wanted to be out of Delhi and out of my parents’ home because of their strictness, their rules and those regulations which were difficult to follow. But after coming out, the exposure is fine and I like my job but the other day, I ended up crying on the phone to my mother because I felt alone.” Homesickness is a reality that hits all at some point of being away, but while many continue to fight it, still others accept it as a part of life.
Vignesh Raghupathy, 27 belongs to Tiruchirapalli, Tamil Nadu. He originally moved to Mumbai with relatives, and to Pune for his MBA at the age of 22 and then to Delhi for a job. Being now placed in Chennai, he sometimes misses home and his favourite ‘curd rice’. He says, “I do not have any other option but to stay alone.”

Casual worker Suman Kumar, whose children stay with their grandparents in Benaras says that their studies are more important and believes that priorities change a lot of equations. “As much I want them to be here with me, they have their studies there,” says Kumar. Sabitha Jacob, a mother of a 22-year-old girl tells Metrolife, “I never wanted my daughter to go out alone for study or work because she is our only child
and we always had adequate facilities wherever we stayed.”

While being ‘rebellious in nature’ to being ‘cool’ are some of the popular tags attached to such decision-takers, ‘a set precedent’ by society is what disturbs many.

Gurgaon-based Vaibhav Jalan, 24, rues the fact that he’s been away from his parents, especially his mother, for the last eight years and his job commitments would not let him go back to his hometown, Kishanganj, Bihar.

“I have the money and everything except my home, which I miss dearly,” says Jalan. “It is unfortunate that people have to move from their places because of lack of opportunities and the social pressure to make a name.”

“Music, food, reading, pursuing hobbies, a strong company of friends and finding a home away from home can help,” says Divya Ratan, a counsellor at Hutchings School, Talegaon, Pune.

She adds, “Homesickness can be avoided if it’s been a healthy and encouraging relationship at home. Sometimes, a small trip home can help big time.”

Svati Arachelvan, 25, an MBA is all set to come home in August with a job that
does not pay as much but will keep her to her ‘home, sweet home’.  “I wanted to get out of Delhi and the fascination to do that was there for a long time. But, when it
eventually happened, I could not take it anymore. I used to cry every other day for my mother’s ghar ka khana,” shares Arachelvan, who has been away since two years.