Gift for gaffes

I’m always credited with an uncanny knack to do the weirdest and wackiest things. Once, at a drycleaners, after having collected my package, I absent-mindedly, along with the change, had shoved off into my sling bag a bunch of shop shelves’ keys too! Soon I realised my folly, on checking that constant clank in my purse while walking. As I dashed back to return those keys, I saw the poor fellow rummaging his shop for the same. Even today, every time the shopkeeper spots me, he makes sure to safeguard all his strewn shop items. Maybe he thinks I’m a potential kleptomaniac on the prowl.   
Another time, I was getting extravagantly decked up for a big bash. Suddenly sensing some irritation in my eyes, I liberally used some eye drops. Later on at the gathering, I noticed people tyring to evade me, dodging their gazes. Feeling a jot odd, I headed to restroom, to take a dekko into the mirror. Boy! I let out a shriek. Indeed I scared myself looking at my reflection. Thanks to some reaction triggered by the eye drops, my eyes had gone red as if I was suffering from a sever case of conjunctivitis!
Yet another time, I was enjoying a hearty confab with a friend at a five-star hotel. After sometime, on seeing the sumptuous spread of delicacies, I got up to pick up some. As I walked, I felt I had suddenly developed a wobbly gait. Worse, I saw people gawking at my feet. I squirmed to realise my stilettos had got interchanged.
Then again at the Karwar Naval base, when once moseying around in moonlit night, I happened to see two strapping officers strolling on the sidewalk. As I was eliciting some attention, I hadn’t noticed an open drain beside, and fell into that. Fortunately, it was bone-dry. .
Again, at a multiplex theatre, I had accidentally pushed my shoes underneath a front-row seat. As I was  scrambling to fish it out with my right hand, I gave a generous shower of popcorn held in my left hand on the head of the person sitting in front. Much to his chagrin, I guffawed too as I felt he looked a spectacle with jasmine buds-like popcorn, adorning his thick clump of tresses.
Well, I suppose it needs some special talent to do these bizarre stuff, that too, at incongruous moments.

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